Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.  (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

Dear Brother Burhan. Assalamalaikum. May Allah reward you enormously for your great services for Islam.

Brother , i want to ask you whether its advisable for people born in the US or UK and raised there to marry only people from their own community and having the same way of brought-up ?? I`m from Pakistan and I`ve proposals from the US but my relatives advise my family not to proceed the matter since after getting married , great compatibility problems arise and mostly ends up in separation. What do you say about it ?and what does Islam say about marrying someone from a different culture , even if they are practicing Muslims ??

Plz reply me as soon as possible.Its urgent.

Jazak Allah.

(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)

Answer:

Marry from different culture

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is no one (no idol, no person, no grave, no prophet, no imam, no dai, nobody!) worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 23 Surah Al-Mu’minun verse 52:

And this ‘Ummah’ of yours is one ‘Ummah’, and I (Allah) am your Lord, so fear Me alone!

Beloved Sister in Islam, the question you have posed has two distinct aspects:

1. Would it be Islamically legal to marry a believer who is not from their same background or culture
2. Would it be better to marry one who has the same background rather than with one who comes from a different background and culture.

The Ummah of Islam is one brotherhood, and Islam absolutely permits one who has professed belief in Allah and His Last Messenger (saws) to marry any eligible, chaste, believing woman of his choice, regardless of her color, race, language, culture, background, nationality, etc. Such a marriage would be absolutely legal and permissible in the sight of Shariah.

The other aspect is whether it is advisable or best to choose a girl who has a similar back-ground, education level, likes and dislikes, common language, etc. to one who does not. There is absolutely no doubt that when one has a common background and similar culture and language, the communication and compatibility of the couple, between themselves and their extended families, would be much better than one who does not have a similar background. But if one, for whatever reason, chooses to marry an eligible believer from a completely different background or culture or race, there is absolutely no harm and no restriction in Islam and such factors do not effect the validity of their marriage in any way.

Allah is our witness, if one follows the simple but extremely invaluable and effective advice of the Messenger of Allah (saws) when choosing a spouse, the chances of a successful marriage are enhanced enormously.

When choosing a girl for marriage:

Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 7.27 Narrated by Abu Huraira

The Prophet (saws) said, "A woman is married for four things, i.e., her wealth, her family status, her beauty and her religion. So you should marry the religious woman (otherwise) you will be a loser."

When choosing a boy for marriage:

Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 3090 Narrated by Abu Hurayrah

Allah's Messenger (saws) said, 'When someone with whose religion and character you are satisfied asks your daughter in marriage, accede to his request. If you do not do so, there will be temptation on Earth and extensive corruption.'

What do you say about it ?

In my humble opinion, background, wealth, beauty, education, social status, reputation, compatibility, age, piety, etc. are amongst the several key and valid factors one looks for when choosing for a spouse to marry; but only when one gives supreme weight to the ‘religious and piety’ factor when choosing a spouse, one would enormously increase the chances of a successful marriage.

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

Burhan