Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.  (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

Asalamualiakum. My parents brought a proposal for me. The boy has pretty OK inclination towards religion but definately not a stuanch follower of all the practices of islam. He confessed to me about his earlier relationship of 1 1/2 yrs with a girl whom he loved and wanted to marry but could not marry because she did not belong to our religion neither was she willing to convert and this according to him is the reason behind the break-up with that girl. He says its past now and would never go to her once he gets married to another girl. If i believe him, then will that be appreciated by Islam to marry such a boy inspite of his past??

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Answer:

Proposal of boy

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

Beloved Sister in Islam, if you sincerely believe that the boy is repentant at the transgression of the boundaries of Allah Subhanah in his past, and you are absolutely satisfied with his character, and with his practice in religion, you may accept his proposal.

Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 3090 Narrated by Abu Hurayrah

Allah's Messenger (saws) said, 'When someone with whose religion and character you are satisfied asks your daughter in marriage, accede to his request. If you do not do so, there will be temptation on earth and extensive corruption.'

But if you are not satisfied that the boy who proposed to you is sincerely repentant at his transgression of forming an unlawful relationship with another woman in the past, and if as you have yourself mentioned the boy is not a staunch follower of all the practices of Islam…..then it would only be prudent to reject the proposal of such a person and seek a suitor in whose character and state of religion you are absolutely satisfied. Allah is our witness sister, it is nothing but wishful thinking to assume that a person who is deficient in fulfilling the rights that are due to one’s own Creator would fulfill the rights that are due to other human beings!

Although a marriage between two eligible non-mehram believers of the opposite sex would be valid and lawful in the Sight of Shariah, I personally would not like to give my daughter or my sister in marriage to a person who is clearly deficient in practicing his deen.

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

Burhan