Wife accomodation seperate divorce.
Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,
As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)
One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:
I would please like to ask you the following questions:
1.Can a man divorce his wife on the basis that she does not want to live in the same house with his mother, who openly does shirk, non-islamic behaviour and kuffar,in various aspects of daily life?
2. What is the position/rights of a daughter-in-law in islam with regards to her husband and in-laws?
I would truly appreciate all your kind help and advice in the light of Islam and Hadith.
(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)
Wife accomodation seperate divorce
In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.
Your Question: What is the position/rights of a daughter-in-law in islam with regards to her husband and in-laws?
In light of the guidance of the Quran and the Sunnah, the wife has absolutely no duty and responsibility laid upon her by Islam towards her husbands family or in-laws, including the husbands parents, brothers, sisters, uncles, aunts, etc. The responsibility and duty that Islam has laid upon the believing wife is only towards making sure that her husband is pleased and satisfied with her in every aspect of her life!
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 4 Surah Nisaa verse 34:
34 Men are the protectors and maintainers of women because Allah has given the one more than the other, and because they support them from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient and guard in (the husband's) absence what Allah would have them guard (their modesty and chastity, the honor and property of their husband, etc.)
Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 286 Narrated by Umm Salamah
The Prophet (saws) said: If a woman dies
while her husband was pleased with her, she will enter
Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 3272 Narrated by Abu Hurayrah
When Allah's Messenger (saws) was asked which woman was best he replied, "The one who pleases (her husband) when he looks at her, obeys him when he gives a command, and does not go against his wishes regarding her person or property by doing anything of which he disapproves."
Thus, in essence, if a believing woman worships Allah
Subhanah as He Alone deserves to be worshipped, preserves her chastity, and
strives to the best of her ability to please her husband, the Messenger of
Allah (saws) declared that she will be given the honor to enter the
Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 3254 Narrated by Anas ibn Malik
Allah's Messenger (saws) said, "When a
woman observes the five times of prayer, fasts during Ramadan, preserves her
chastity and obeys her husband, she may enter by any of the gates of
Having said that she has absolutely no responsibility towards her husbands family or her in-laws, does not in any way mean or imply that she is allowed to be rude, or disrespectful, or dishonor them in any way. She must at all times strive to develop cordial relations with her in-laws.
But if the believing woman does, of her own free will, serves the parents or family of her husband, she would be doing a deed of ehsaan, a deed which would be over and above her prescribed duties and responsibilities; and Allah Subhanah has time and again declared in the Glorious Quran that He absolutely loves those believers who do ehsaan or deeds which are over and above their role of duty and responsibility.
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 3 Surah Ale-Imraan verse 134 (part):
134 . for Allah loves the muhsineen (those who do deeds over and above their call of duty).
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 3 Surah Ale-Imraan verse 148:
148 And Allah gave them a reward in this world and the excellent reward of the Hereafter. For Allah loves the muhsineen (those who do deeds over and above their call of duty).
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Baqarah verse 195 (part):
195 and do ehsaan; for Allah loves the muhsineen (those who do deeds over and above their call of duty).
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 5 Surah Maidah verse 93 (part):
93 .. For Allah loves the muhsineen (those who do deeds over and above their call of duty).
The wife in Islam is absolutely under no obligation to take care or serve her husbands parents or family; the duty and ultimate responsibility that the parents are served and well cared for is entirely upon the direct off-spring of the parents.
But if the wife, of her own will and choice, wishes to go over and above her prescribed duties and in her benevolence serves the parents and/or family members of her husband, she would be doing the extremely meritorious deed of ehsaan; and Allah Subhanah absolutely loves those who do ehsaan or deeds over and above their prescribed duties.
If a husband is blessed with a wife who does ehsaan and serves his parents, he should be extremely grateful and thankful to her for her superb gesture of benevolence and kindness over and above her prescribed duties and responsibilities.
Your Question: Can a man divorce his wife on the basis that she does not want to live in the same house with his mother, who openly does shirk, non-islamic behaviour and kuffar,in various aspects of daily life?
If for whatever reason the wife in Islam does not wish to live with her in-laws, she is well within her rights in Shariah to ask her husband to provide a separate and distinct accommodation for her; and if Allah Subhanah has blessed the husband with the means, he should comply with this lawful demand of his wife and provide for a separate accommodation for her.
The right the wife in Islam does not have in the least is to demand that her husband leave his parents and move in with her in her separate accommodation; for it remains the duty of the son to serve and arrange to provide for his parents until they are alive. The decision to whether live with his parents and serve and provide for them, or live with his wife and continue to serve and provide for his parents from there is entirely upto the husband alone.
Although a divorce pronounced by the husband upon his wife for whatever reason whatsoever will be absolutely legal and binding in Shariah, for a husband to divorce his wife only because she chooses to exercise her lawful option to demand for a separate accommodation would not be considered piety and righteousness on the part of the husband in the Sight of Allah Subhanah.
If one trusts, obeys, and follows the guidance and commands of Allah and His Messenger (saws), one can be assured of never ever being misled; but if one believes, obeys and follows any other guidance, other than that of Allah and His Messenger (saws), one can be assured of being led astray.
Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allahs Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.
Your brother and well wisher in Islam,