I am married from the last 8 years and dont have child.
Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,
As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.
(May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)
One of our brothers/sisters has asked
this question:
Salaam-u
alikum,
i am
married from the last 8 years and dont have child. i consulted many doctors and
read all the quranic suras which help in having a child. doctors tried every
effort even i.v.f, which also didnt help.i love and respect my wife very
much.but at the same time i want to have child very badly as there is no one in
my family other than my mother and wife.i dont want to cheat my wife or never i
can think of leaving her. many people advised me to go for adoption, which i
came to know from ulmaas that it is haraam to go for adoption.
I
sometimes think to remarry some other person just for the sake of child. i even
discussed this matter with my wife. she says in clear cut that if you do this i
will go by back to my home.i told her that i will marry that lady just as a
contract just to have child for you, then i will leave her.
Sir it
sounds like film but this is the reality of my life.now i am think that to go
for marriage till i have child without telling anybody, at the same time i dont
want to hide anything from her.
I am
very god fearing person.WHAT SHOULD I DO?
Please
give me some advice as per islamic norms.
I will
be highly grateful
Thanking
you
umar
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Answer:
Secret childless temporary marriage
In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask
for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever
He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that
there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that
Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.
Your Statement: i am
married from the last 8 years and dont have child.
Allah Says in the Holy
Quran Chapter 42 Surah Shura verses 49-50:
49 To Allah belongs the Dominion of the heavens and the earth. He creates what He Wills. He bestows (children) male or female
according to His Will.
50 Or He bestows both males and females, and He leaves barren whom He
Wills: for He is Full of Knowledge and Power.
My
beloved and dear Brother in Islam, to bestow one with off-spring or leave them
childless is in the Sole Hands and a Decree of none save Allah Subhanah Alone! Your Lord Creator is well aware of the
condition of each amongst His slaves, thus keep your faith constant in Allah
Subhanah, the One and Only Creator and Bestower of the Worlds. May Allah Subhanah make your trial easy for
you, and may The Lord Most Merciful bestow patience and steadfastness on you to
accept whatever He has Planned, Willed, and Decreed for you. May Allah Subhanah fulfill your heart’s
desire and bestow upon you righteous offspring, who become the contentment of
your eyes in the life of this world, and a source of attaining
One of
the best supplications to make to the Merciful Lord when one wishes for an
offspring is the humble and wholesome supplication of the Prophet Zachariah
(a.s.) when he was childless until an abject old age.
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 21 Surah
Anbiya verses 89-90:
89 And (remember) Zakariya when he cried to
his Lord: "O my Lord! Leave me not without offspring, though Thou
art the Best of Inheritors.”
90 So We listened to him: and We granted him
Yahya: We cured his wife's (barrenness) for him. These three were ever quick
in emulation in good works: they used to call on Us with love and reverence,
and humble themselves before Us.
My dear and beloved brother in Islam, know with absolute
and total conviction that your condition and your desires are not unknown to
your Lord Most Gracious, for He is well aware of the exact condition of each in
His creation. Your condition is no more
a trial and a test bestowed upon you from your Lord, thus be constant and
consistent in your supplication to the Merciful Lord, and beseech Him and Him
Alone in humility, in awe, and in hope for all that your heart desires; for
there is none in the universe other than the One and Only Merciful Lord Who has
the Power to hear and respond to the supplications of His believing
slaves.
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 35 Surah
Fatir verse 2:
2 What Allah out of His Mercy doth bestow
on mankind, there is none who can withhold: what He doth withhold, there is
none can grant apart from Him: and He is the Exalted in Power, Full of Wisdom.
Your Statement:
….many people advised me to go for adoption, which i came to know from ulmaas
that it is haraam to go for adoption.
Regardless of whether one is married or unmarried,
regardless of whether one has a child or is childless, regardless of whether
one is able to conceive or not, ….. not only is it permissible in Islam to
adopt and/or sponsor orphan children, it is absolutely encouraged and considered
amongst the greatest virtues in Islam; and if one genuinely takes good care of
their adopted children, a means of earning huge rewards from Allah Subhanah.
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah
Baqarah verse 177:
177 It is not righteousness that ye turn your faces toward East or West;
but it is righteousness to believe in Allah and the Last Day and the Angels and
the Book and the Messengers; to spend of your substance out of love for Him for
your kin, for orphans, for the needy, for the wayfarer, for those
who ask, and for the ransom of slaves; to be steadfast in prayer and practice
regular charity; to fulfil the contracts which ye have made; and to be firm and
patient in pain (or suffering) and adversity and throughout all periods of
panic. Such are the people of truth, the
Allah-fearing.
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah
Baqarah verse 215:
215 They ask thee what they should spend (in charity). Say: “Whatever ye spend that is good is for
parents, and kindred, and orphans, and those in want, and for
wayfarers. And whatever ye do that is
good Allah knoweth it well.
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah
Baqarah verse 220:
220 …..They ask thee (O Prophet (saws)) concerning orphans. Say: "The best thing to do is what is
for their good.”
Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 4974 Narrated by Abu Umamah
Allah's Messenger (saws) said, "If
anyone strokes an orphan's head, doing so only for Allah's Sake, he will have
blessings for every hair over which his hand passes; and if anyone treats well
an orphan girl or boy under his care, he and I (Prophet Mohamed (saws)) shall
be like these two in Paradise," putting two of his fingers together!
Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 4973 Narrated by Abu Hurayrah
Allah's Messenger (saws) said, "The best
house among the Muslims is one which contains an orphan who is well treated,
and the worst house among the Muslims is one which contains an orphan who is
badly treated."
Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 8.34 Narrated by Sahl bin Sad
The Prophet (saws) said, "I and the
person who looks after an orphan and provides for him, will be in
In light of the above guidance of the Quran and Sunnah one
cannot even imagine the rewards the Lord Most Gracious would bestow on those blessed
and fortunate people who took good care of orphans.
Because the relationship of blood in Islamic Law has
obvious ties towards marriage, inheritance, etc.; there are certain guidelines
in Islam a believer who wishes to adopt must follow:
Allah says in the Holy
Quran Chapter 33 Surah Ahzaab verses 4-5:
…Allah has not made
your adopted sons your real sons. These
are the things which you utter from your mouths, but Allah says what is based on reality; and He Alone guides to the
- The child will always be called by his/her
biological father’s name.
- The child will only inherit from his original
blood-relationship. He will not be
eligible to inherit from his foster-parents. The foster-parents who adopt the child
may have the option to will or bequeath upto a maximum of one/third of
their wealth to their adopted children after their death, if they wish to
do so.
- If the foster-mother has nursed the adopted
child in her infancy, then she will be considered a mehram of the child; but
if the foster-mother has not nursed the adopted child, then she will not
be considered a mehram of the adopted child.
Thus my beloved brother, the concept of
‘adoption-in-Islam’, far from being declared ‘haraam’ is an absolutely
encouraged and meritorious act in the Sight of Allah Subhanah, provided one
fulfills the simple conditions of Shariah while practicing adoption.
Your Question:…..i
sometimes think to remarry some other person just for the sake of child. i even
discussed this matter with my wife. she says in clear cut that if you do this i
will go by back to my home.i told her that i will marry that lady just as a
contract just to have child for you, then i will leave her.
Beloved brother, you are well within your rights in Islam
to exercise your option to marry another woman, if you wish to do so….but we
assure you from the guidance of the Quran and the Sunnah that a mere marriage
to another woman will not guarantee you a child if Allah Subhanah has Decreed
otherwise for you! To bestow one with
off-spring or leave them childless is in the Sole Hands and Domain of none save
Allah Subhanah Alone.
Sahih Al-Bukhari
Hadith 5.527 Narrated by Ali bin
Abi Talib
On the day of
Khaibar, Allah's Messenger (saws) forbade the Mut'a (i.e. temporary marriage).
To marry a woman on a contractual or temporary basis is
absolutely and categorically declared as ‘haraam’ and forbidden in Islam for the
believers who sincerely fear Allah and the Last Day….thus that should not even
be an option if indeed you fear Allah and His Day of Accounting!
Your Question: i am
think that to go for marriage till i have child without telling anybody, at the
same time i dont want to hide anything from her.I am very god fearing
person.WHAT SHOULD I DO?
Beloved brother, as we said earlier, you are well within
your rights to exercise your option of marrying another woman…..but to marry
someone in secrecy without telling or informing anyone would be against the
guidance of Allah and His Messenger (saws)!
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 5 Surah
Maidah verse 5:
5 …… (Lawful unto you in
marriage) are (not only) chaste women who are believers but chaste women among
the People of the Book revealed before your time, when ye give them their
due dowers and desire chastity, not lewdness nor secret intrigues. If anyone rejects faith fruitless is his work
and in the Hereafter he will be in the ranks of those who have lost (all
spiritual good).
Beloved Brother in Islam, the guidance of Islam Commands
and Demands that the believers marry desiring chastity, not lewdness and secret
intrigues! It is only those who are
inclined towards the heinous and abomination of the evil of ‘zina’ who develop
lewd and secret intrigues; for the sacred institution of marriage in Islam is a
public affair whereby one is guided and commanded to openly declare one’s
sacred association of marriage to the society one lives in by offering the
‘walima’ or marriage banquet or feast.
Your Question: i am
very god fearing person.WHAT SHOULD I DO?
Dear and beloved brother, in the situation you find
yourself, herein listed are the lawful options available to you:
- Bear
your condition with patience, keeping your full trust and belief in the
Mercy and Grace of your Lord Most Gracious.
- Leave
no stone unturned in seeking the best medical treatment available which
would enable your wife to bear you the off-spring you so desire.
- Seek
to adopt a child and give it the love, honor, and everything that you
would to your own child except your name.
- You
are well within your rights to exercise the option of marrying another
woman….but with the intention to love, and honor and cherish her as your
lawfully wedded wife. To exercise
the option of marrying again on a temporary basis would not only be
prohibited and ‘haraam’ in Shariah and thus a grave sin in the Sight of
Allah Subhanah, but an absolute injustice to the innocent woman you seek
to marry….a burden and a sin which you will have to account for and answer
in the Presence of your Lord Most Majestic on that Inevitable Day of
Judgment.
May Allah Subhanah bestow upon you the wisdom and the
courage to choose the option that is pleasing and acceptable to Him.
If one trusts, obeys, and follows the guidance and
commands of Allah and His Messenger (saws),
one can be assured of never ever being misled; but if one believes, obeys and follows any other
guidance, other than that of Allah and His Messenger (saws), one can be assured
of being led astray.
Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to
Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only
Source of Strength.
Your brother and
well wisher in Islam,
Burhan
Wister