Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

As salam Alykum,

I had no choice but marry someone for the sake of my parents because the man i loved did not love me.unfortunately even after having 2 kids i have no attraction n love for my husband and at the same time i never see love in his eyes for me.

I am not able to give my best to my husband .

I feel its better to live life alone rather than to live this way.But beacuse of kids I`m just continuing the marriage.

Please help

(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)

Answer:

Not Content with Marriage

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

Dear and beloved Sister in Islam, regardless of the situations and conditions which inspired you to give your consent to unite with your husband in the sacred bond of marriage….the fact remains that you committed yourself to the sacred institution of marriage, and it would only be piety and righteousness in the Sight of Allah that you strive your utmost to fulfill your duties and responsibilities unto your husband in your marriage.

Sahih Muslim Hadith 3469 Narrated by Abu Hurayrah

Allah's Messenger (saws) said: ‘a believing man should not hate a believing woman (his wife); if he dislikes one of her characteristics, he will be pleased with another.’

Dear and beloved sister in Islam, if after your very best efforts, you still sincerely fear that you are not able to fulfill your duties and responsibilities unto your husband, or you sincerely fear that you might not be able to live within the boundaries of the Lord in your marriage…….then Islam has recognized that two human beings who at one time in their lives intended and committed to unite in the sacred institution of ‘nikaah’, might not get along for any reason and may wish to go their separate ways…..thus as detestable and disliked such a separation might be in the Sight of Allah Subhanah, separation through the institution of divorce is considered lawful in Islam.

Sunan of Abu-Dawood Hadith 2173 Narrated by Abdullah ibn Umar

The Prophet (saws) said: ‘Of all the lawful acts’ the most detestable to Allah is divorce.’

Sunan of Abu-Dawood Hadith 2172 Narrated by Muharib

The Prophet (saws) said: ‘Allah did not make anything lawful more abominable to Him than divorce.’

Your Question: I am not able to give my best to my husband .
I feel its better to live life alone rather than to live this way.But beacuse of kids I`m just continuing the marriage.

Please help

Beloved sister, under the given conditions you have two lawful options:

1. Either strive to the best of your ability to commit yourself entirely to fulfilling your duties and responsibilities to your husband in the marriage….and thus save your marriage…
2. And if you cannot bring yourself to do that, you are well within your rights to initiate a separation from your marriage through the institution of divorce.

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

Burhan