I cannot tell my parents to allow me to marry and they will not allow me now.
Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,
As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.
(May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)
One of our brothers/sisters has asked
this question:
i
cannot tell my parents to allow me to marry and they will not allow me now, so
i want to marry without telling them as i want to be away from gunah by meeting
my fiance. tell me what should be the solution
(There may be some grammatical and spelling
errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from
questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in
confidentiality.)
Answer:
Marry Secretly
In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His
help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide,
and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear
witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear
witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His
Messengers.
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 5 Surah
Maidah verse 5:
5 …. (Lawful unto you in
marriage) are (not only) chaste women who are believers but chaste women among
the People of the Book revealed before your time when ye give them their due
dowers and desire chastity, not lewdness nor secret intrigues. If anyone rejects faith fruitless is his work
and in the Hereafter he will be in the ranks of those who have lost (all
spiritual good).
Beloved Brother, the guidance of Islam Commands and
Demands that the believers marry desiring chastity, not lewdness and secret
intrigues! It is only those who are
inclined towards the heinous and abomination of the evil of ‘zina’ who develop
lewd and secret intrigues; for the sacred institution of marriage in Islam is a
public affair whereby one is guided and commanded to openly declare one’s
sacred association of marriage to the society one lives in by offering the
‘walima’ or marriage banquet or feast.
Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 8.395 Narrated by Anas
The Prophet (saws) seeing a yellow mark (of
perfume) on the clothes of 'Abdur-Rahman bin 'Auf, said, "What about
you?" 'Abdur-Rahman replied,
"I have married a woman with a Mahr of gold equal to a date-stone."
The Prophet (saws) said, "May Allah bestow His Blessing on you (in your
marriage). Give a wedding banquet, (Walima) even with one sheep."
For a ‘marriage’ or ‘nikaah’ to be lawful and acceptable
in the Sight of Shariah Law and of Allah Subhanah, the following four
absolutely obligatory conditions of an Islamic ‘nikaah’ have to fulfilled:
- Proposal
by one party and acceptance by the other.
- The
determination of ‘mehr’ for the bride.
- The
availability of at least two witnesses to the marriage contract.
- The
consent of the parents/guardians of the bride to the marriage contract.
As much as it would be against piety, righteousness, and
behavior becoming of a muslim to marry secretly without informing or the
participation of their near and loved ones, if one has fulfilled all the
obligatory conditions of an Islamic marriage, their marriage itself will be considered
lawful in the Sight of Shariah Law.
Your
Question: ….tell me what should be the solution
The ‘solution’ my dear and beloved brother in Islam is to
sincerely fear Allah Subhanah and not do anything which would ignite or incite
the Displeasure, Wrath and Anger of The Lord Most Majestic, Most Supreme! It would only be akin to piety and
righteousness on your part to display patience, and not contrive or conspire to
marry your fiancé secretly and make a mockery of the sacred institution of
marriage…..but rather with extreme wisdom, patience, and tenderness explain
your condition to your beloved parents and seek their approval and consent to
your marriage.
Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only
due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me
alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is
the Only Source of Strength.
Your brother and
well wisher in Islam,
Burhan