Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

Asalaamulaikum,
My question is about marriage. I met a gal over internet and i know her for past many months and I like her. She is elder to me by 2 yrs. and She is a divorcee and Even her family status is not so good. Even though the good part is her character and nature. She is very islamic and kind from heart. I havent met her once since i know meeting unknown women in islam is not permissable, however i want my parents to meet her first and decide. My question to you is, Can i marry a gal like this and I want to hide about her past to my parents, can i do this. Please help and suggest me how should i deal with this situation. 

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Answer:

Hide from parents to marry

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

Your Question: …..Can i marry a gal like this

Provided all the obligatory conditions of an Islamic ‘Nikaah’ are honored, the marriage of a believer to a non-mehram divorced believing woman who is older to the man would be absolutely lawful in the Sight of Shariah Law and of Allah Subhanah.

Your Question: …..and I want to hide about her past to my parents, can i do this.

If for any reason one chooses not to disclose the past of one’s prospective bride to one’s parents, provided all the obligatory conditions of the ‘nikaah’ are met….such a marriage would be lawful and valid in the Sight of Shariah Law.

Although the marriage itself would be lawful and valid in Shariah, beloved brother, to intentionally ‘hide’ the past of one’s prospective bride from one’s parents would be morally and ethically incorrect to say the least, nor would it be considered akin to piety and righteousness in the Sight of Allah Subhanah.

Marriage is not a mere union between two people in Islam, but rather it is a union between two extended families; and it is inevitable that one day the information that you wish to ‘hide’ from your parents might become known to them and the knowledge that their own son contrived and participated in hiding information from them could cause them much hurt and pain; and there is a possibility that the trust that should remain between a parent and their child will be severely effected and dented.

In our humble opinion brother, it would be best, and akin to piety and righteousness in the Sight of Allah to not intentionally hide any information about the past of the prospective bride from one’s parents in order to seek their approval to the marriage….that would save you, your prospective wife, and your beloved parents a lot of trouble and anguish in the future.

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

Burhan