Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.  (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

Salaam alei kum, I would like to say thank you for the dedication you provide to us.  I read the questions/answers of No. 132 about Christian marriage.  I'm a bit confused trying to tie it together in the situation my family is dealing with.  So please, it is a bit personal but I would like to know what is most likely going to happen.  I know that Allah is most forgiving.  If I can explain my situation and answer it as best as you can:

A couple years ago, my sister secretly developed a relationship with a Christian man.  She ended up getting pregnant by him.  They both confronted my parents and I with their situation.  We went through a one year ordeal of fights, arguments, etc.  Finally we had no choice but to except it.  I leave this sin committed by my sister in Allah's hands even though I feel responsible that it happened.  My sister married him in US law and Islamic law after she found out she was pregnant.  I know that he did not convert to the Islamic religion, as he is a strong Christian believer.  He married my sister in the Islamic religion to shut my parents up.   I know he didn't marry her in Islam for the correct reasons.

As I read the Q&A of #132, I might have interpreted it wrong.  It seemed like you said that it might be allowed for my sister as a Muslim to marry a Christian man.  I'm not sure!  I guess I would like to know what would happen in her situation.  The thing is that I am pretty sure her kids where

baptized, they do not follow in the Islamic beliefs.  I'm not judging their lives, but the fact is that she allows her husband and kids eat pork, her & her husband drink alcohol.  My sister thinks that they are his kids and not hers, she says she is still a Muslim.  Isn't it true that the mother also follows in the religion the father believes in?  I know that she doesn't do the basic five pillars of Islam.  My parents also believe that as long as they mention that she needs to pray and fast once in a while that they will not be at fault, also will I pay for her mistakes as I am the oldest in the family?

My Uncles and Aunts that are Hajj's do not talk to my sister they basically

disowned her.  That's a story in itself!  Is that wrong of my Uncles and Aunts to do that?  Please give me you're opinion about my situation

Thank you, your brother in Islam.

(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)

Answer:

Muslim woman marries Christian

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is no one (no idol, no person, no grave, no prophet, no imam, no dai, nobody!) worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad(saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

Allah Subhanah has made it permissible for a believing man to marry a righteous woman from amongst the People of the Book (the Jews and the Christians); but has absolutely forbidden a believing woman to marry a non-believer, unless he converts to Islam.

Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Baqarah verse 221 (part):Do not wed your women to ‘mushrik’ men, unless they believe.

The marriage of a believing woman to a Christian man is null and void, and will not be recognized as a legal marriage in Shariah.

But if the Christian man has declared the testification of faith by saying ‘I witness that there is no god but Allah Alone, and Mohamed (saws) is His Messenger’, the person will be accepted as a legal muslim; and his marriage to a believing woman will be deemed legal in Shariah. Once he has declared the testification of faith, the matter of belief and faith is with the person and Allah Subhanah; for the humans beings do not have the power to see or know what exactly was in the man’s heart before he declared the ‘shahaadah’. If the person simply declares the ‘shahaadah’ to marry a believing woman, and both of them are aware that that is the only reason the non-believer declared the ‘shahaadah’, then both of them will have a severe accounting in the Court of Allah Subhanah on an Inevitable Day.

Your Question: will I pay for her mistakes as I am the oldest in the family?

If you and your parents did all that you could in discouraging the marriage, there will be no sin on you. You duty as elders was to make your sister aware, and if you did all you could have done to discourage the marriage; you will Insha Allah, find Allah Subhanah Merciful and Forgiving.

But if you and your parents could have stopped the marriage, but allowed it willingly; then you would also share a part of the blame for this grievous sin.

My Uncles and Aunts that are Hajj's do not talk to my sister they basically disowned her.  That's a story in itself!  Is that wrong of my Uncles and Aunts to do that?

Under normal conditions, it is considered a huge sin in Islam to break bonds of blood relations which Allah Subhanah has made. Whatever a person does, she will always remain related to you in the blood relationship that Allah Subhanah has bonded.

Short of disowning her, your aunts and uncles are correct in their behavior of not associating with your sister; as a sign of their disapproval for her heinous sin and her open disobedience of Allah Subhanah’s clear Commands. They are her elders, and if they just acted normally as if nothing has happened, and did not show their displeasure at their niece’s open disobedience of Allah Subhanah, they would share a part of the blame.

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your Brother in Islam,

Burhan