I m feeling very guilty writing this, but this is very necessary for me to know. I simply hope if you can understand my problem, my feelings and guide me the right direction with the help of Quran. Please do reply to me.
Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,
As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)
One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:
I m feeling very
guilty writing this, but this is very necessary for me to know. I simply hope
if you can understand my problem, my feelings and guide me the right direction
with the help of Quran. Please do reply to me. I wrote to you long back but you
didnt reply me. I was married when i was 15 years old n my husband left me
after 10 months of our marriage(he didnt
divorce me) and never turn up till date. I did my engineering in the mean time
and i felt i m burden on my parents and got a job. I dont need to mention that
for a woman whose husband has left how much depressed and tough a life could
be. But I never complained about it and thought whatever is happening to me, it
is for something good that I dont know. Now where I was working, I met a man
who was my colleague, he was caring n helped me a lot in my problems and we
became friends and I dont know how our friendship turned to love( though I m
not of that type, I m domestic type woman). That was Ok but the thing that
taunts me a lot is that one day I went to his flat and there we didnt have sex
but we did something of the type, I hope you understand. we did the things that
should be done after the marriage. I asked him whether will he marry and he
said he would love but he cant due to some of his house problems.
I know what I did was very wrong knowing that its a sin. Now I m very scared n dont know how to face Almighty. Can you help me out of this problem? Please I request you to help me or else I may commit another sin suicide.
Please brother help me.
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Husband abandons wife
In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is no one (no idol, no person, no grave, no prophet, no imam, no dai, nobody!) worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.
Your Statement: I was married when i was 15 years old n my husband left me after 10 months of our marriage(he didnt divorce me) and never turn up till date.
Dear and Beloved Sister in Islam, since your husband never actually divorced you, you would still be considered his wife in the Sight of Islamic Law. If your husband has left you and never returned to date, he will be held guilty in the Sight and Court of Allah Subhanah for not fulfilling his duties towards you in marriage, and sister rest assured that on Inevitable and Tumultuous Day your Lord will recompense the injustice your husband has done towards you in full.
Beloved Sister, since your husband has not fulfilled his duties towards you and not returned for a substantial time, you are well within your rights to move the Shariah Court to grant you a divorce from your husband; and there would be absolutely no blame or sin upon you.
Your Question: I know what I did was very wrong knowing that its a sin. Now I m very scared n dont know how to face Almighty. Can you help me out of this problem?
Whatever deeds one might have done in one’s past, if one turns to Allah Subhanah in sincere Taubah and seeks forgiveness, Allah Subhanah has promised in the Holy Quran that He will forgive all the sins of such a believer, even if one has committed the gravest sin of all: ‘Shirk’! Not only that, our Lord is so Merciful and Generous, that not only will He forgive the sins of the believer, He will change his evil deeds done into good deeds!
The conditions or ways to seek sincere Taubah or Repentance from the Merciful Lord are:
- One is aware that he has sinned, and feels sorry and ashamed at his sin.
- Makes a solemn covenant and promise with Allah that he will not repeat his sin again.
- Turns to Allah and seeks forgiveness, before he has met with his appointment of death.
- Is a believer and does righteous good deeds thereafter.
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 39 Surah Zumur verses 53-54:
(O Prophet) say: “O My servants who have wronged their own souls….Do not despair of Allah’s Mercy! Surely, Allah forgives all sins. He indeed is the All Forgiving, All Merciful. Return to your Lord and submit to Him before the scourge overtakes you; for then you may get no help from anywhere.”
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 3 Surah Ale Imraan verse 135-136:
Allah likes such good people very much, who, if ever they commit a base deed or wrong their own soul by the commission of a sin, remember Allah instantly, and ask for forgiveness from Him for their shortcomings. For who, but Allah, can forgive sins? (And Allah loves those) who do not knowingly persist in the wrongs they did. These will be rewarded with forgiveness from Allah, and with Gardens beneath which canals flow, and they will reside therein forever! How excellent is the reward of those who do good deeds!
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 25 Surah Furqaan verses 63-71:
The (true) servants of the Merciful are those who walk humbly on the earth. When the ignorant people behave insolently towards them, they say, “Peace to you”; (And those) who pass their nights in prostrating themselves and standing before their Lord and pray, “O our Lord, save us from the torment of Hell, for its torment is killing! It is an evil abode, and an evil resting place”. (And those) who, when they spend are neither extravagant, nor miserly, but keep the golden mean between the two extremes. (And those) who do not invoke any god but Allah Alone, nor kill a soul unjustly, which Allah has forbidden, nor commit adultery… He who does this shall be punished for his sin, and his torment shall be doubled on the Day of Resurrection, and he shall abide in a state of ignominy; EXCEPT THE ONE WHO MAY HAVE REPENTED (AFTER THOSE SINS), AND HAVE BELIEVED AND DONE RIGHTEOUS DEEDS. For then, Allah will change his evil deeds into good deeds, and He is very Forgiving and Merciful. In fact, one who repents and does righteous deeds, returns to Allah as one rightly should!
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 6 Surah Anaam verse 54:
When those come to you who believe in Our Signs, say: "Peace be on you! Your Lord had inscribed for Himself (the rule of) Mercy. Verily if any of you did evil in ignorance, and thereafter repented and amended (his conduct), Lo! He is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful."
My dear and beloved sister in Islam, the shame and fear that you have expressed in your letter is evidence of your state of repentance for your past deeds; and this state is precisely the first step towards seeking sincere Taubah from the Lord Who is Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful towards His believing and repentant slaves. Rest assured that if you are sincerely sorry at whatever you did in your past, and you have implored and beseeched your Lord Most Gracious in humility and in fear to forgive you and have amended your conduct thereafter, it is expected that you will find your Lord Forgiving and Merciful. If your repentance is indeed sincere, not only will you Lord wipe out your sins from your Book of Records, He will not even ask you about them on that Inevitable Day of Judgment.
Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 2357 Narrated by Abdullah ibn Mas'ud
Allah's Messenger (saws) said, "He who repents of a sin is like him who has committed no sin."
Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.
Your brother and well wisher in Islam,