I have been married for abt 8 months and i was engaged in long distance now that we are married and together my husband is a completly different person then the one i knew while we were engage and i talked to over the telephone.
Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,
As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa
Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)
One of our brothers/sisters has asked
this question:
I have
been married for abt 8 months and i was engaged in long distance now that we
are married and together my husband is a completly different person then the
one i knew while we were engage and i talked to over the telephone. and since
we have been married after abt 3 months everything has changed he has doubts abuot
me he thinks i lie to him about every lil thing(which is not true) he used to
tell me he prays but he does not when i as him why he said i lied to you. he
drinks behind my back. and he accusses me of lying. he does not beleive me and
he does not allow me go to my parents home. what should i do? please advise me.
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Answer:
Unhappy marriage
In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask
for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever
He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there
is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad
(saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.
Dear and beloved Sister, Islam has recognized that human
beings are not animals which when bonded together must stay together; but if
Allah forbid, one finds themselves unfortunately bonded in an incompatible or
unhappy marriage, both the husband and the wife in Islam have a right to
initiate a divorce and free themselves from their marriage union.
Beloved Sister, under the circumstances you have
mentioned, you have two lawful options:
- If
you have hope that the situation will change in the future, and if you
sincerely believe that your husband can be guided to fear Allah, start
worshipping Allah as He deserves to be worshipped, and stop transgressing
the clear boundaries of Allah…..it would be best that you strive to, with
patience and wisdom, guide your husband to the path of righteousness and
piety….and thus save your marriage.
- But
if even after your very best efforts, you do not see any hope of your
husband fearing Allah and honoring His Boundaries, it would be best that
you free yourself from such an evil person through a divorce.
Whatever written of
Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever
of error is of me alone. Allah Alone
Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.
Your brother and
well wisher in Islam,
Burhan
Wister