Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.  (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

It is not always true that men are more polygamous by nature as compared to a women. Women are more polygamous by nature as compared to a man. Then why can’t women marry more than once?

(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)

Answer:

Why is Polygamy prohibited for woman in Islam?

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is no one (no idol, no person, no grave, no prophet, no imam, no dai, nobody!) worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

Your Comment: Women are more polygamous by nature as compared to a man.

This statement is not a scientific fact, and I humbly challenge you to give me documentary evidence that women are more polygamous by nature as compared to men!

Allah Subhanah, Who Created men and women, and everything else that exists in the Universe, knows the ‘fitrah’ (nature) of everything He created. We believe that each and every law and command of the All Knowing, All Wise Allah is based on perfect wisdom and knowledge; and Allah is Glorified and Exalted that He never errs.

The same Allah Who created men and women, has allowed polygamy to be practiced by men, and commanded the women to be monogamous. And in His Divine Wisdom and Perfect Knowledge, Allah has made all the laws exactly according to the nature of His creation, and all family laws and commands are made so that the individuals and societies can live as a peaceful and harmonious community.

Lets use our intelligence, commonsense and reasoning to derive the facts.

1. If a man practices polygamy, and Allah blesses them with a child; there will absolutely be no dispute as to who is the father and mother of the child. But if the woman practices polygamy, there will be a dispute as to who is the father. (I fully understand that with modern technology it is possible to determine the father, but can you imagine that everytime the woman delivers a child, they will have to do a DNA testing to determine the father!)

2. If a man practices polygamy, it has been proven that there is absolutely no risk of transmitting any sexual diseases. But when a woman practices polygamy, it has been proven that the risk of transmitting a sexual disease is increased manifold.

3. If one takes any lessons from history, it is evident that since time immemorial, it has always been the men who practiced polygamy in every religion and in every nation. Never is there a situation where the women practiced polygamy.

4. If one takes a look at society where polygamy is banned or discouraged, you will see that some men will always try to fulfill their need for more partners by illegal means; which gives rise to the ‘oldest profession in the world’: prostitution. Seldom has there been a demand for male prostitution in the annals of history.

5. With the advent and culture of ‘feminism’ and ‘equality of the sexes’, the feminists have at times gone too far in their demands, sometimes even against the very nature of human beings. They just simply fail to realize the fact that men and women are created different physically, emotionally, and psychologically. And the All Wise created them to live in harmony with each other, not to compete against each other! But to claim that woman are more polygamous by nature than men, is absolutely absurd. This is a disease of this generation and nothing to do with fact and reality.

6. It has been scientifically proven that the main attraction for men towards women is physical, and the minor attractions could be the woman’s wealth, lineage, and character. But in the case of the woman, she could be attracted for a variety of reasons to a man; be it his character, social standing, power, intelligence, physical, etc. This can be easily proven in everyday life. If a man sees a semi-clad curvaceous and beautiful women, it will arouse his sexual emotions immediately, as compared to a woman being sexually aroused by just seeing a handsome man!

It is not that Allah has commanded that every man must practice polygamy. It is only a legal allowance for men, who for any reason, need to habitate with more than one partner.

Each of Allah’s Laws and Commands are based on His Perfect Wisdom and Knowledge and in absolute accordance with the ‘fitrah’ or nature of His creation. If we follow these Divine Laws, we will live a life in peace and harmony with nature. And if we challenge and try to change these Divine Laws, we will be going against the created nature, and this will give rise to nothing but chaos, instability and disharmony. Just take a look at our modern un-Godly society and see for yourself the menace and chaos which has been created by not following the Divine Laws:

The vice and effects of alcohol.

The vice and effects of the drug culture.

The vice and effects of gambling.

The vice and effects of prostitution.

The vice and effects of usury. Etc.

And the effects of these evils and vices do not just affect the individual committing the act, but it also affects his family, his community and the whole of mankind! And can you imagine when the people who come to power, try to legalize and justify these vices in the name of ‘freedom of the individual’, what will be the state of the community and society at large! These un-Godly people will go on experimenting one thing after another, and move from darkness into further darkness in the name of this ‘freedom’!

For believers, it is enough evidence that our Lord and Creator has allowed men to practice polygamy, and women to practice monogamy in the Holy Quran. For the ones who do not believe in the Divine Laws and the Divine Wisdom, they will go on experimenting every idea until they will bring ruin and destruction upon themselves and their societies; and that is extremely apparent today in their lives.

Follow Allah and His Messenger (saws) and you will never, I repeat never, ever, go wrong. Challenge and follow anything forbidden by Allah and His Messenger (saws) and you will always go wrong; even if it has some immediate pleasure and gain, in the long run it will bring nothing but chaos, ruin, and sorrow!

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

Burhan