Second marriage of father.
Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,
As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.
(May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)
One of our brothers/sisters has asked
this question:
Assalamu
alikum I am a son of person.my age is 20 and my dad has married himself
to second wife just few months back. can u tel me whether son has d right to
question about dis to father.. If not
can my mother ask dads 2nd wife to leave my dad?
(There may be some grammatical and spelling
errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from
questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in
confidentiality.)
Answer:
Second marriage of
father
In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His
help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide,
and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear
witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear
witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His
Messengers.
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 4 Surah
Nisaa verse 3:
3 If ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans
marry women of your choice two or three or four; but if ye
fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them) then only one
or (a captive) that your right hands possess.
That will be more suitable to prevent you from doing injustice.
Allah Subhanah has Himself allowed and permitted a
believing man to marry and keep a maximum of four wives at any one time if he
wishes to do so, provided he is confident he will be able to deal justly and
equitably amongst his wives.
If the married person who wish to marry for a second time
is absolutely confident that he will be able to do justice amongst his multiple
wives, there is absolutely no harm in him exercising his right to choose to
marry more than once. Such a marriage
will be absolutely valid, legal and lawful in the Sight of Shariah Law and in
the Sight of Allah Subhanah.
Your
Question: …..can u tel me whether son has d right to question about dis to
father..
Respected brother in Islam, one cannot over-emphasize the
importance and significance of being kind, tender, humble, and the serving and
being dutiful to one’s parents in Islam…… Second only to the heinous and the
ultimate abomination of ‘shirk’ in the Sight of Allah is for an off-spring to
be undutiful to one’s parents!
Allah says in the Holy
Quran Chapter 17 Surah Bani Israel verses 23-24:
Your
Lord has enjoined the following: You should not worship anyone but Him
Alone! Treat your parents with
great kindness; if either or
both of them attain old age, do not
even say ‘uff’ to them; nor rebuke
them; but speak to them kind words. Treat them with humility and tenderness and
pray, “O our Lord, be merciful to them,
just as they brought me up with kindness and affection in my childhood.”
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 31 Surah
Luqman verse 14:
14 And We have enjoined on man (to be good) to his parents: in travail upon travail did his mother bear him and in years twain
was his weaning: (hear the command) "Show gratitude to Me and to thy
parents: to Me is (thy final) Goal.
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 4 Surah
Nisaa verse 36:
36 Serve Allah and join not any partners with Him: and do good to
parents kinsfolk orphans those in need neighbors who are near neighbors
who are strangers the companion by your side the way-farer (ye meet) and what
your right hands possess: for Allah loveth not the arrogant the vainglorious;
Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 4941 Narrated by Abu Umamah
A man said, "O Messenger of Allah
(saws), what rights can parents demand from their children?" He (saws) replied, "They are (or
your relation with them will determine) your
Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 8.18 Narrated by Aisha
The Prophet (saws) said: "The word 'Ar-Rahm' (womb) derives its
name from 'Ar-Rahman' (i.e. Allah). So
whosoever keeps good relations with it (womb i.e. kith and kin), Allah will
keep good relations with him, and whosoever will sever it (i.e. severs his
bonds of kith and kin) Allah too will sever His relations with him!"
Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 3.821 Narrated by Anas
The Prophet (saws) was asked about the
‘Kabair’ (the absolute gravest sins in the Sight of Allah). He (saws) replied:
"They are:--
To join others in worship with Allah,
To be undutiful to one's parents,
To kill a person (which Allah has forbidden
to kill) (i.e. to commit the crime of murder),
And to give a false witness."
Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 8.290 Narrated by Abu Bakra
Allah's Messenger (saws) said, "Shall I
inform you of the biggest of the Great Sins?" They said, "Yes, O
Allah's Messenger (saws)!" He (saws) said, "To join partners in
worship with Allah, and to be undutiful to one's parents."
Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 3655 Narrated by Abdullah ibn Umar
Allah's Messenger (saws) said, "There
are three people to whom Allah has forbidden
Such is the rank and status the Lord Most High has
accorded to parents in Islam that only after the rights due to Allah Subhanah
and His Messenger (saws), the biggest rights in all mankind are due to one’s
parents, regardless of whether one’s parents are believers or disbelievers! Thus it is absolutely obligatory upon the
believers who sincerely fear Allah and the Last Day to be humble, kind, tender,
and devoutly obedient to each and every lawful wish and command of their
parents.
Respected brother, if your father has exercised his option
of legally marrying another woman, he is well within his rights to do so. You as the son do not have a ‘right’ to
question him regarding the matter, or be rude or untoward or rebuke or ridicule
him in the least…..but if you so wish to satisfy your heart regarding the
reason he might have to chose to marry again, you may approach him in absolute
humility and politely enquire from him his reasons or his plans for the
future.
Respected brother, you must realize and accept that your
father has exercised a lawful option in Shariah, and you have no other option
but to accept and honor his decision regardless of how much your heart compels
you to challenge his decision….that is if indeed you sincerely fear Allah and
the Last Day and understand your position as a son in respect to the rank and
position of your father.
Your
Question: ….If not can my mother ask dads 2nd wife to leave my dad?
Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 8.598 Narrated by Abu Huraira
Allah's Messenger (saws) said, "No woman
should ask for the divorce of her sister (Muslim) so as to take her place, but
she should marry the man (without compelling him to divorce his other wife),
for she will have nothing but what Allah has written for her."
If the second marriage of your father is so detested and
unacceptable to your mother, she is well within her rights in Islam to ask your
father to divorce her (ie. your mother), or she has the right to approach a
The Messenger of Allah (saws) explicitly and specifically
forbade the believing woman from asking her husband to divorce his other
wife/wives so that she may have the husband to herself…..for the fact is that
each will have nothing but what the Lord Most Majestic has Decreed and Written
for them.
If one trusts, obeys, and follows the guidance and
commands of Allah and His Messenger (saws),
one can be assured of never ever being misled; but if one believes, obeys and follows any
other guidance, other than that of Allah and His Messenger (saws), one can be
assured of being led astray.
Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only
due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me
alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is
the Only Source of Strength.
Your brother and well
wisher in Islam,
Burhan
Wister