Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.  (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh,

Dear Brother in Islam,

I’m new Muslim and practicing Islam, I fear much Allah swt and I try to escape from bad things and to become a good Muslim with help of Allah swt. Before to me, my mother accepted Islam for marriage purpose, but she didn’t practice Islam, after sometime they got separated. She started to worship other than Allah. She knows that Islam is the truth but she doesn’t accept it or doesn’t want to follow it. When I say about what will happen to us if we don’t worship only Allah swt, and all about hell, she says that who show these things and deny the truth.

The problem is that we stay together and I do not watch tv, I do Quran recitation and listening to Quran, but she is very much keen to watch tv and she gets fed up with my Islamic activities. When I make her to understand it’s just a waist of time, she get angry with me and think that I’m not good child towards to her.

I’m confused now; I should let her to watch tv or stop her from bad things and force her to study Islam. I’m afraid to Allah swt and his punishments coz ignoring my duty toward to of my mother. Please tell me how I should act in this issue.

JazaakAllah Khairan

Sister in Islam.

(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)

Answer:

Mother watch tv

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

Dear and beloved Sister in Islam, it is only natural and an extension of one’s belief and one’s love for one’s loved ones that one fears for their loved one’s well-being in this world and especially their Hereafter. Thus your concern for your mother’s (mis)deeds are only natural and becoming of your faith and trust in the Laws of your Lord Creator.

Beloved Sister, having said that, you must remember that a child or off-spring is neither the guardian of their parent, nor is the child responsible for the deeds or misdeeds of their parents!

Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 7.128 Narrated by Ibn Umar

The Prophet (saws) said, "All of you are guardians and are responsible for those under your wards. The ruler is a guardian of his subjects and is responsible for them; the man is a guardian of his family and is responsible for them; the lady is a guardian and is responsible for her husband's house and his offspring; and so all of you are guardians and are responsible for those under your wards."

Your Question: I’m confused now; I should let her to watch tv or stop her from bad things and force her to study Islam. I’m afraid to Allah swt and his punishments coz ignoring my duty toward to of my mother. Please tell me how I should act in this issue.

Beloved Sister in Islam, since Allah Subhanah has not made you a guardian over your mother, you are not directly responsible for her deeds or mis-deeds of your mother; nor will the Lord Most Just hold you accountable for her belief or her actions.

Thus your duty in such circumstances is to be and remain a dutiful daughter to your mother, and with absolute humility, wisdom and above all patience strive to invite her to the Truth of Islam and to the fear of Inevitable Tribunal in the Hereafter of the Lord Who Created. If your mother accepts your invitation to the Truth of Al-Islam, it would be for her own good; and if she chooses to reject and deny your invitation, she alone would be responsible for her decision.

Beloved Sister, because a child is not made the guardian of their parent in Islam, under absolutely no circumstances would it be allowed or permissible for you to force your mother to believe, or force her to stop doing what are considered evil deeds in Islam, or force her to study something she does not wish to study!

What you can and should do as a dutiful and loving daughter is with absolute humility, tenderness, kindness, politeness…..and with wisdom and above all patience to invite your mother to the Truth of Al-Islam; and remain absolutely constant in beseeching and imploring your Lord Merciful in your supplications to have mercy on your mother and soften her hearts towards the Truth. To accept or reject your invitation to the Truth is entirely upto her, and she alone will be responsible for the decisions she makes for herself.

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

Burhan