Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.  (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

Salaam Walekum

this may be the third time i am approaching to your good self with my problem mentioned below. i hope this time "Allah" considers my request and i get a piece of advise for my this question.

i am a divorcee and i have an dependent one daughter who is 14 years old. three years before during my work with one organization i was been approached by a Bohri Muslim guy for marraige proposal. As i am Hindu i did not give any reply to him because was afraid of the two different relegion and the world. He still did not stop approaching me and slowly i started having feeling for him so did he. During my delaying the reply to him he got engaged and did not inform me then when i was mentally ready i showed him my feelings unknowingly of his engagement. The momen he got my reply he broke his engagement which i came to know later and got angry with him that why he kept me unaware of his getting engaged. I felt that i had done a sin of breaking this engagement.

After the engagemet of that guy broke he started more coming towards me and explained me that what ever happens is for good. I then could not stop my feelings and agreed about my love towards him. During this period he tried to convince his parents but this was not possible because i was a divorcee with one daughter and 5 years elder to him. He then got married and i took the help of god to support my self to finish the feelings towards him as he was not mine any more.

The main impotant was that during these three years we had a physical relationship with each other and i had to abort his child twice which was another sin i made and i know i will be punished for that for which i am ready.

But now the main problem is that after he getting married he still is coming to me inspite of me telling him no and advising him that this is another sin we are doing now getting involved in each other by heart. He says that he still loves me and would not like to leave me. When ever he comes to me he is saying that you are my wife (not legally) because 

you had my child in your womb twice, that was different matter we could not manage to give that child birth because we are not married.

I know this story is too big, as i read all the questions sent by muslims which are small. But i need to know my place in this guys life. I seek advise from you as i know you will surely this time consider my request and advise me where is my place and what do i have to do.

PLease help me.

May God give you more vision to help all Muslims/Non Muslims

Khuda Hafiz 

(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)

Answer:

Hindu sister relationship with Muslim

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is no one (no idol, no person, no grave, no prophet, no imam, no dai, nobody!) worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

Beloved sister in humanity, first and foremost we seek your sincere forgiveness for not responding to you earlier. We assure you that this is the first time we have received this message from you. Whatever be the case, we sincerely seek your forgiveness and understanding for the delay.

Allah Says in His Glorious Quran Chapter 2 Surah Baqarah verse 221:

221 Do not marry ‘mushrik’ (those who worship idols) women until they believe.

Beloved Sister, Islam absolutely prohibits and does not recognize as valid a marriage between a muslim and ‘mushriks’ or those who worship more gods than the One and Only Creator, unless of-course the person accepts Islam for then it would be permissible for the two to get married in the Sight of Islamic Law and Allah Subhanah.

Secondly for two people who are unmarried to have a sexual relationship is considered amongst the gravest sins in Islam; and the only way to absolve oneself of that heinous and abomination sin of fornication is to turn back to the Creator, believe in Him, and seek sincere repentance from Him; it is expected that they will find their Lord Forgiving and Merciful.

Your Question: But now the main problem is that after he getting married he still is coming to me inspite of me telling him no and advising him that this is another sin we are doing now getting involved in each other by heart. He says that he still loves me and would not like to leave me. When ever he comes to me he is saying that you are my wife (not legally) because you had my child in your womb twice, that was different matter we could not manage to give that child birth because we are not married.

Beloved sister, not only on a religious basis, but even on a moral basis your association with the boy is absolutely immoral and unlawful and regardless of what the man says, you should clearly let him know that neither is he being fair and just with himself, nor is he being fair and just with you, nor is he being fair and just with the one whom he is engaged to marry!

A woman does not become one’s wife simply because one has committed the heinous abomination of fornication with that woman; thus what the man says has neither any moral nor legal basis. He has obviously taken advantage of your condition of being a single mother, and fulfilled his desire with you without taking any responsibilities whatsoever!

Beloved sister, unless you wish to study, understand and accept Islam, which as your sincere well-wishers in humanity would be our advice….there is absolutely no future in your relationship with the man and before things get any more complicated than they already are, and before the two of you accumulate any more sins in the Sight of the Creator, it would be best if you bring this unlawful and immoral relationship to an end immediately.

My beloved sister in humanity, it is indeed unfortunate that the person you met and got involved with called himself a ‘muslim’, for I assure you that everything the person did with you is against every teaching and guidance of the religion of Truth, Al-Islam! My only request and pleading to you is not to judge the religion and way of life called Al-Islam because of your association with this one man….but to judge the man by studying and understanding the religion of Islam.

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

Burhan