Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

I was in angry. I told to my wife single time that there is no relationship between me and you. so what will be the result. what should i do. plz reply me soon.

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Answer:

Kinaya declaration of divorce

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

If the husband merely says or declares that ‘I am GOING to divorce you’ unto his wife, absolutely regardless of how many times the husband may say such a thing, it is merely an utterance from his mouth for an ‘intention’ to divorce does not constitute a legal declaration of divorce in the Sight of Shariah Law and of Allah Subhanah.

But if the husband were to say to his wife words to the effect of ‘I divorce you’…..absolutely regardless of whether the husband uttered this declaration in anger or in jest, it would constitute a legal declaration of divorce between the couple in their marriage.

Sunan of Abu-Dawood Hadith 2189 Narrated by Abu Hurayrah

The Prophet (saws) said: ‘There are three things which, whether undertaken seriously or in jest, are treated as serious: Marriage, divorce and taking back a wife (after a divorce which is not final).’

But if a husband were to say to his wife words to the effect ‘there is no relationship between you and me’…..the husband will be asked what exactly he meant by the declaration; and if the husband meant a declaration of divorce by those statements, then indeed it will be counted as one declaration of divorce.

Your Question: what should i do.

If at the time you declared these statements ‘there is no relationship between you and me’ to your wife, your intention was not to divorce your wife…then no divorce will be established. But if your intention, when you declared those statements was to divorce your wife, then indeed one divorce will be established between you and your wife in the marriage.

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Baqarah verse 229:

229 A divorce is only permissible twice: after that the parties should either hold together on equitable terms or separate with kindness.

The first two divorce declarations in a marriage are revocable in Shariah; thus even if you meant divorce when you declared those statements, you are well within your rights to revoke the divorce within the waiting period or ‘iddah’ of divorce which is three menstruation periods of the wife.

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Baqarah verse 228:

228 Divorced women shall wait concerning themselves (iddah) for three monthly periods; nor is it lawful for them to hide what Allah hath created in their wombs if they have faith in Allah and the Last Day. And their husbands have the better right to take them back in that period if they wish for reconciliation.

If the husband has declared a divorce which is revocable (the 1^st or the 2^nd), he is well within his rights to revoke that divorce before the expiration of the ‘iddah’ or waiting period which is three menstrual cycles of the woman. In such a situation, the divorce will be revoked and the husband and the wife may live together again as a married couple without any need to perform a ‘nikaah’ again.

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Baqarah verse 232:

232 When ye divorce women and they fulfil the term of their (`Iddat) do not prevent them from re-marrying their (former) husbands if they mutually agree on equitable terms. This instruction is for all amongst you who believe in Allah and the Last Day. That is (the course making for) most virtue and purity amongst you and Allah knows and ye know not

But if a husband does not revoke the divorce before the expiration of the ‘iddah’ period of three menstrual cycles, a divorce will be established and the woman is free to marry anyone of her choice. If after the expiration of the ‘iddah’ period (be it nine months or ninety years!), the same couple wish to re-marry again, there is allowance in the Shariah…..but a brand new ‘nikaah’, with a brand new ‘mehr’, etc. will have to performed between the couple.

But if the husband were to pronounce divorce for a third time, it will be absolutely irrevocable and the couple can never ever marry again unless and until the wife happens to marry another person, and that person, of his own will happens to divorce her or dies.

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Baqarah verse 230:

230 So if a husband divorces his wife (irrevocably for the third time) he cannot after that remarry her until after she has married another husband and he has divorced her. In that case there is no blame on either of them if they reunite provided they feel that they can keep the limits ordained by Allah. Such are the limits ordained by Allah which He makes plain to those who understand.

Your Question: what should i do.

Thus brother, it all depends on what exactly were your intentions when you declared those statements :

Option-1: If you did not intend or mean to divorce your wife when you declared those statements, no divorce will be established in the Sight of Shariah Law in your marriage.

Option-2: If you did indeed intend or mean to divorce your wife when you declared those statements, then one divorce will be established in your marriage in the Sight of Shariah Law and of Allah Subhanah. If it was the first (or the second) declaration of divorce in your marriage, you are well within your rights to revoke the divorce and live as a married couple again.

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

Burhan