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Second marriage lawful.

Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

 

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

Assalam-o-Alaikum
My father, a doctor, has always been an arrogant and cold man. he used to emotionally torture, beat and mistreat my mother up to the point that she became mentally ill and psycotic. she is on medicines for past several years. my grandfather, who used to handle situations, died .A month after his death, my father married a nurse at his previous workplace living in a different city.they were having an affair on mobile phone. He told every body that he married for the "Bakshish" of his father and it is a "naiki to give name to a lady who is not getting rishtas"
My mother, I and our immidiate family were totally unaware of this doing for almost a year till one day we recieved a call. i asked my father but he denied.That night i slept contented. Next evening he took me to the hospital. A baby was placed on my lap, i was given sweet and my father declared his marriage. My mother is in shock since she new about it and that was the most terrifying moment of my life. i wish i was dead before it happened.

 

Please tell me;

*IS THIS WHAT ISLAM TEACHES?

*IS HIS MARRIAGE VALID without my mothers permission?

*we are studying and are dependant upon him but hate him indefinately?

*Will an affair on cellphone, resulting in marriage give peace to my grandpa`s soul?

 

(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)

 

Answer:

 

Second marriage lawful

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

 

Your Question: IS HIS MARRIAGE VALID without my mothers permission?

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 4 Surah Nisaa verse 3:

3 If ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly with the orphans, marry women of your choice: two, or three, or four; but if ye fear that ye shall not be able to deal justly (with them) then only one or (a captive) that your right hands possess. That will be more suitable to prevent you from doing injustice

 

The one and only condition Allah Subhanah has laid upon the believers who wish to exercise their lawful option of marrying more than one wife is that they are absolutely just amongst their wives in the distribution of their time and their resources amongst them. There is absolutely nothing in the Quran nor in the authentic Sunnah which stipulates or puts a condition that a believer needs the prior permission or consent of his first wife before he marries for a second time.

 

There is allowance and an option in Shariah for the believers who wish to marry more than one wife upto an absolute maximum of four, if indeed the believer wishes to exercise this option.but he must fear Allah and practice justice between his wives.

 

Provided all the obligatory conditions of a nikaah were honored, the second marriage of your father will be deemed absolutely lawful and legal in the Sight of Shariah Law and in the Sight of Allah Subhanah.

 

Your Statement: .we are studying and are dependant upon him but hate him indefinately?

Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 17 Surah Bani Israel verses 23-24:

Your Lord has enjoined the following: You should not worship anyone but Him Alone! Treat your parents with great kindness; if either or both of them attain old age, do not even say uff to them; nor rebuke them; but speak to them kind words. Treat them with humility and tenderness and pray, O our Lord, be merciful to them, just as they brought me up with kindness and affection in my childhood.


 

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 31 Surah Luqman verse 14:

14 And We have enjoined on mankind (to be good) to their parents: in travail upon travail did his mother bear him and in years twain was his weaning: (hear the command) "Show gratitude to Me and to thy parents: to Me is (thy final) Goal.

 

Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 8.18 Narrated by Aisha

The Prophet (saws) said: "The word 'Ar-Rahm' (womb) derives its name from 'Ar-Rahman' (i.e. Allah). So whosoever keeps good relations with it (womb i.e. kith and kin), Allah will keep good relations with him, and whosoever will sever it (i.e. severs his bonds of kith and kin) Allah too will sever His relations with him!"

 

Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 3.821 Narrated by Anas

The Prophet (saws) was asked about the Kabair (the absolute gravest sins in the Sight of Allah). He (saws) replied: "They are:--

  1. To join others in worship with Allah,
  2. To be undutiful to one's parents,
  3. To kill a person (which Allah has forbidden to kill) (i.e. to commit the crime of murder),
  4. And to give a false witness."

 

Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 8.290 Narrated by Abu Bakra

The Messenger of Allah (saws) said, "Shall I inform you of the biggest of the Greatest sins?" They said, "Yes, O Allah's Messenger (saws)!" He (saws) said, "To join partners in worship with Allah, and to be undutiful to one's parents."

 

After the rights due to Allah and His Messenger (saws), in Islam the biggest rights in all mankind are due to ones parents. The enormity of being undutiful to ones parents can be imagined by the fact that The Messenger of Allah (saws) listed being undutiful to ones parents as the second gravest of all the gravest sins in Islam!

 

Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 3653 Narrated by Abdullah ibn Amr

The Prophet (saws) said, "An undutiful son, a gambler, one who casts up what he has given, and one who is addicted to wine will not enter Paradise."

 

Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 3655 Narrated by Abdullah ibn Umar

Allah's Messenger (saws) said, "There are three people to whom Allah has forbidden Paradise: one who is addicted to wine, an undutiful son, and a cuckold who agrees to his womenfolk's adultery."

 

Dear and beloved brother in Islam, absolutely regardless of what ones parents might have done or said in the past, absolutely regardless of whether or not they fulfill their responsibilities towards their off-spring or not, regardless of their conduct, or character, or condition.their child, being one who sincerely believes in Allah and the Last Day, should never never ever resent them, or be rude towards them, or break relations with them, or say unto them even a harsh word!

 

Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 17 Surah Bani Israel verses 23-24:

Your Lord has enjoined the following: You should not worship anyone but Him Alone! Treat your parents with great kindness; if either or both of them attain old age, do not even say uff to them; nor rebuke them; but speak to them kind words. Treat them with humility and tenderness and pray, O our Lord, be merciful to them, just as they brought me up with kindness and affection in my childhood.

 

My dear and beloved brother in Islam, absolutely regardless of what ones parents might have said or done in the pastit would only be prudent for the believing off-spring to remember that this life is only a place of test and a trial.and the honor of serving ones parents is an opportunity for the righteous to earn the ultimate reward of Paradise from their Lord in the Hereafter.

 

Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 4941 Narrated by Abu Umamah

A man said, "O Messenger of Allah (saws), what rights can parents demand from their children?" He (saws) replied, "They are (or your relation with them will determine) your Paradise or your Hell."

 

Sahih Muslim Hadith 6189 Narrated by Abu Hurayrah

Allah's Messenger (saws) said: Let him be humbled into dust! Let him be humbled into dust! It was said: O Allah's Messenger (saws), who is he? He (saws) said: He who sees either of his parents during their old age or he sees both of them, but he does not enter Paradise (through his deeds of service towards them)!

 

Regardless of whatever ones parents might choose to say or do it just does not behove and befit one who sincerely believes in Allah and the Last Day to treat them harshly, or Allah forbid, hate or disown them! Allah is our witness brother, there is only one crime and sin greater in the Sight of Allah than an off-spring being rude, or manner-less, or harsh with their words and their deeds with their parents.ie. shirk or associating other gods with Allah Subhanah!!!

 

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 13 Surah Ar-Raad verse 25:

As for those who break their covenant with Allah after confirming it, who cut asunder relationships which Allah has bidden to be joined, and spread chaos on the earth, theirs shall be the curse, and they shall have a wretched abode in the Hereafter.

 

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Bakarah verse 27:

And He leads astray only those who disobey Allah, who break Allahs covenant after ratifying it, who cut asunder relationships what Allah has ordered to be joined, and who produce chaos on the Earth. These are indeed the people who are the losers.

 

Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 8.17 Narrated by Abu Huraira

The Prophet (saws) said, "The word 'Ar-Rahm (womb) derives its name from Ar-Rahman (i.e., one of the Names of Allah) and Allah said: 'I will keep good relation with the one who will keep good relation with you (the womb, i.e. kith and kin), and sever the relation with him who will sever the relation with you (the womb, i.e. kith and kin).

 

It is absolutely impermissible, forbidden, and an abomination of a sin in the Sight of Allah for one to break or sever any ties or relationships of blood which the Lord Himself has created for them, leave alone hating or breaking relations with ones own father!!!

 

Dear and beloved brother in Islam, whatever might have transpired between oneself and ones parents in the past, whatever they might have chosen to say or do unto their own off-spring, whatever the situation and conditions.the believing off-spring, as one who fears Allah and the Last Day, must never never ever say or do anything which would cause them even an iota of pain and grief.if indeed they sincerely believe in Allah and the Last Day. Only and only if one is satisfied that their Lord Creator Himself will sever relations with him, should one ever even contemplate of ever breaking or severing their relationship with their own parents!!!! Such is the gravity of breaking or severing ones blood relationships in the Sight of Allah Subhanah! THIS IS WHAT ISLAM TEACHES!

 

If one trusts, obeys, and follows the guidance and commands of Allah and His Messenger (saws), one can be assured of never ever being misled; but if one believes, obeys and follows any other guidance, other than that of Allah and His Messenger (saws), one can be assured of being led astray.

 

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allahs Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

 

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

 

 

Burhan

 


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