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Proclaimed 2 divorces

Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

Aslamalaikum, I saw mention on this website of the english translation of the Holy Quran by Abdullah Yusuf Ali, I read this and found it to be both refreshing and enlightening. I am hoping you can enlighten me as to which way is best for me to proceed. I suffered from polio at eight months old, this left me completely paralysed for a while but then my strength returned, although my legs were left weak and I was left with a permanent walking problem. Maybe because of this I have been a patient and calm, happy person most of my life, I obtained a degree and worked for a long time. In 2011 I was diagnosed with Post Polio Syndrome (PPS) by a specialist Doctor (neurological), this basically means in a day I run out of energy quickly and need to pace myself. I am not sure if this is related to PPS but most days I find it difficult to sleep completely through the night. If I do not get enough sleep I become more emotional in a day. Over the last 4 years I have had times when I cry uncontrollably on my own, I lose my temper quickly in family situations. I have had times when I have thought about suicide and even wrote out my last wishes. All I could think of was getting out of the marriage as I was unhappy, the same thoughts kept reoccurring, I kept on feeling I needed to get out of the marriage. My children would be talking to me I wouldn’t realise they were talking to me until they shouted or prodded me. Since then I have attended counselling sessions and I am on anti-depressents (Citalopram tablets) as the Doctor said chemicals in my brain might have got effected over the years. I make sure I get enough sleep even if this means I wake up late. I have gradually gone back to being the kind of person I use to be. After 19 years of marriage with 4 children currently me and my wife live close but we are separated. Unfortunately before I realised I was in need of medical help, I issued my wife with Talaqs. With words similiar to "From me you have Talaq", on more than two occasions. Mentally I was in a disoriented state, the night before I issued one of the talaqs, I was considering crashing my car into a lamp post. When I issued the talaq I threw a table in front of me to the floor. This was really out of character for me as I am a happy and calm person normally. On two occassions since I read the isitkhara dua, on the night at about 1am on one occassion, I saw my son asking me to come home. On the second time near the morning I saw my wife. I was really unwell with depression, sleeping problems, Post Polio Syndrome symptoms including fatigue and also I believe I had OCD (Obsessive compulsive disorder) repetitive thoughts that caused me anguish and all of these things made me disoriented. Can me and my wife continue with married life so our children can have a proper family? With normal health I would not have issued the talaqs. Please can you issue a fatwa or guide me in this matter?.

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Answer:

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

Brother if you have proclaimed only 2 talaqs then it is yet possible to annul the divorce within 90 days of the proclamation. If the iddah period of 3 months has passed, then you can re-marry her by a new nikah, 2 witnesses and a new mehr. After this if you utter these dreadful words of divorce again, then it would mean that you have used your three options and this third divorce will be irrevocable.

Make sincere taubah to Allah swt and InshaAllah you will find Him merciful and forgiving. Do not make His deen into a joke and honor and respect your word.

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allahs Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

Members of Islamhelpline


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