How we can make sure that she is sincerely praying to allah s t , for forgiveness and she is now feeling guilty about what she did.
Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,
As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.
(May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)
One of our brothers/sisters has asked
this question:
Asaalam
alaikum,
I would like to discuss an issue here. Please help and guide me on this
issue...
This is related to unfaithfulness of wife. If a wife has been unfaithful
towards her husband by keeping relationship with other person and did Zina, can
the husband leave/talak her even if she is in pregnant state ?.
According to some answers given here , it is said that, if your wife is asking
for fogiveness for the sin- zina, she has performed, you should forgive her.
But how we can make sure that she is sincerely praying to allah s t , for
forgiveness and she is now feeling guilty about what she did.
The biggest question is should/Can i forgive her ? and how should i make sure
that she wont repeat this sin again in future ?
please guide me on this issue...
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Answer:
Zina of wife
In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His
help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide,
and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear
witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear
witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His
Messengers.
Allah says in the Holy
Quran Chapter 17 Surah Israa verse 32:
Do not even go near
‘zina’ (fornication or adultery) for it is a very indecent thing and a very
evil way!
Zina
(adultery) is considered amongst the gravest sins in Islam. One can only imagine the severity of the sin
by the punishment Allah and His Messenger (saws) have decreed for this
abomination. If one is living in an
Islamic State and gets convicted in a Shariah Court of the sin of zina
(adultery), the punishment prescribed by Allah and His Messenger (saws) for the
life of this world is that the convict should be stoned to death!! And if the person dies without making
‘Taubah’ or seeking sincere repentance for their transgression from Allah
Subhanah before they meet with their appointment of death, their punishment of
the Hereafter in the Just Court of Allah Subhanah would be much more severe and
lasting!!
Dear and beloved brother in Islam, as a believing and
God-fearing husband of a wife who has transgressed the bounds of the Lord and
committed the absolute abomination of ‘zina’, you have two lawful options in
Islam:
Option-1: If you honestly believe that your wife committed
the evil of ‘zina’ in ignorance, fears Allah and His Day of Accounting, and is
sincerely ashamed and repentant for her abomination of a crime….and you can
bring yourself to forgive her, it would be best to forgive her her sin and save
your marriage.
Option-2: But if you see that your wife neither fears
Allah nor the Day of Judgment, nor is she ashamed nor repentant for her
transgressions….and given half an opportunity she would indulge in the same
transgression again; it is incumbent and obligatory upon you as a husband who
sincerely fears Allah and the Last Day to immediately and permanently separate
from such an impious and immoral wife through divorce. It would simply not befit the characteristic
of a believing husband who sincerely fears Allah and the Last Day to agree to
remain married to a woman who insists or continues to commit adultery.
Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 3655 Narrated by Abdullah ibn Umar
Allah's Messenger (saws) said, "There
are three people to whom Allah has forbidden
Your
Question: ….can the husband leave/talak her even if she is in pregnant state ?.
If the husband fears that his wife is unrepentant at her
grave sin of ‘zina’, or fears that she might indulge in the same transgression
again…..he is well within his rights to initiate a divorce proceedings against
her, regardless of whether she happens to be pregnant or not.
Your
Question: …if your wife is asking for fogiveness for the sin- zina, she has
performed, you should forgive her.
If Allah forbid, one’s wife is guilty of the abomination
of ‘zina’, and the husband honestly believes that his wife committed the evil
of ‘zina’ in ignorance, fears Allah and His Day of Accounting, and is sincerely
ashamed and repentant for her abomination….and the husband can bring himself to
forgive her, it would be best to forgive her her sin and save their marriage.
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 24 Surah
Noor verse 22 (part):
…..let them (the
believers) forgive and overlook: do you not wish that Allah should forgive you?
For Allah is Oft-Forgiving Most Merciful.
Just as one who sincerely repents after transgressing one
of the prescribed Boundaries of the Lord wishes that their Lord Most Merciful
would forgive them….the Lord Most Gracious guides the believers that if one amongst
them violates their trust or their rights, they too should show liberality
towards them and forgive and overlook their faults.
Your
Question: But how we can make sure that she is sincerely praying to allah s t ,
for
forgiveness
and she is now feeling guilty about what she did.
Respected brother, the act of ‘taubah’ or repentance is a
condition of the heart and something between the person and their Lord
Alone….and the truth remains that no human being can peek into the heart of
another and verify whether or not the ‘taubah’ done by that person is genuine
or not.
Although there is no absolute way of making sure whether
or not the ‘taubah’ of one who has sinned is authentic or not….one would have a
very good indication one way or the other by examining the manifestation of the
person. If one who has transgressed the
prescribed bounds of Allah Subhanah in ignorance and are absolutely genuine in
their repentance, one would find that such people would tend to spend long
hours prostrating in the audience of their Lord seeking repentance, shedding
tears in fear of standing in their Lord’s Tribunal on that Inevitable and
Tumultuous Day of Judgment, and striving their utmost to amend their conduct by
increasing the doing of good deeds. It
would be almost impossible for a loved one not to witness the dramatic and
visible change that takes place in the life, behavior and attitude of one who
has made sincere repentance.
Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only
due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me
alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is
the Only Source of Strength.
Your brother and
well wisher in Islam,
Burhan
Wister