Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.  (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

Assalam-u-Alaikum WRWB!!!

Respested Sir,

I like to know about my sister sitting in Iddah, she is living in a circle with her husband`s brother`s families surrounding. Is it possible for her to go out with this families for a change in environment, after some days of her husband`s death ( e.g. 40 days) or so.

Please guide us.

JazakAllah

(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)

Answer:

Go out in iddah

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Baqarah verse 234 (part):

If those of you who die and leave wives behind, they should abstain (from marriage) for a period of four months and ten days. Then, when their waiting term expires, they are free to do whatever they choose for themselves, provided that it is decent; you shall not be answerable for this. Allah is fully aware of what all of you do.

The above waiting period of mourning of four months and ten days is an obligatory duty on every believing woman whose husband dies, and it is definitely a practice of all the believing woman, who sincerely believe in Allah and the Last Day. There is slight exception for a widow who is pregnant at the time of the death of her husband… her waiting period or iddah is until she delivers the baby… be it the next day or until after nine months!

Fiqh-us-Sunnah Fiqh 4.23

It is not permissible for a believing woman to mourn at the death of anyone for more than three days, except in the case of her husband's death, when she is to mourn for four months and ten days, which is a legally prescribed period of waiting or "iddah". Muslim, Al-Bukhari, Ahmad, and Abu Dawood report from Umm 'Atiyyah, that the Messenger of Allah (saws) said: "A woman should not mourn for any deceased person for more than three days, except in the case of her husband's death, which she may mourn for a period of four months and ten days. Such a woman (in mourning) is not to wear any (brightly) colored dress. She may wear only plain dress. During this period she should not use any adornment or eye makeup, nor wear any perfume, nor dye her hands and feet with henna, nor comb her hair, except at the end of her menstruation period, when she may use some cleaning or refreshing agents (such as perfume, etc. ) to get rid of any offensive smell left over from her period." Accordingly, when a widow mourns, she must not use any adornment, such as jewelry, kohl, silk, perfume, or henna dye on her hands and feet. A widow must observe this waiting period in deference to her late husband's memory and to fulfill her obligations toward him.

The rules for observing this waiting period or ‘iddah’ and period of mourning are as follows:

1. The widow should not wear fashionable or attractive clothing; neither apply perfume; nor apply make-up, etc. She must be dressed in plain, simple and humble clothing for the period of the ‘iddah’.
2. She should not leave the house unless there is an emergency or a basic need, which no one can do for her. Example: she may go to a hospital if ill, or she may go out to get her food and necessities if there is no one to get it for her, etc.
3. She should be in a genuine state of mourning, remember Allah much, and pray and supplicate Allah Subhanah for her deceased partner and herself.

Your Question: Is it possible for her to go out with this families for a change in environment, after some days of her husband`s death ( e.g. 40 days) or so.

Firstly the period of ‘idda’ or waiting period for a believing widow prescribed by her Lord is not 40 days, but rather four months and ten days. (There is slight exception for a widow who is pregnant at the time of the death of her husband… her waiting period or iddah is until she delivers the baby… be it the next day or until after nine months!)

Unless there is an extremely strong and valid reason for the widow to venture outside her house, like going to a hospital, or to bring or buy her basic needs if there is none to bring them for her, or even to go to work if there is absolutely no one to provide for her, etc.; then there is room and permissibility for a widow to leave her house.

But to only leave the house and venture outside for leisure, or change of environment, or pleasure, or without an absolutely strong or valid reason would neither be righteousness, nor piety, nor in accordance with the guidance of Allah and His Messenger (saws).

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

Burhan