Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.  (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

Just going on from the question 110. What if a two bohris (or muslims for that matter) wanted to get married (one was a Reformist and the other not)

however one set of parents was opposed to it. I In this case it is it right that we should obey our parents? 

(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)

Answer:

Marriage and parents permission

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His  forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is no one (no idol, no person, no grave, no prophet, no imam, no dai, nobody!) worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad(saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

Allah and His Messenger (saws) have declared marriage a Sunnah (voluntary) in Islam, but have commanded and made it ‘Fard-Ayn’ (absolutely obligatory) on every believer to obey their parents.

It is better and purer for the believer, who sincerely believes in Allah and the Last Day, to obey his/her parents; in preference to his/her desires.

Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 17 Surah Bani Israel verses 23-24:

Your Lord has enjoined the following: You should not worship anyone but Him Alone! Treat your parents with great kindness; if either or both of them attain old age, do not even say ‘uff’ to them; nor rebuke them; but speak to them kind words. Treat them with humility and tenderness and pray, “O our Lord, be merciful to them, just as they brought me up with kindness and affection in my childhood.”

It does not behove a believer, who sincerely fears Allah and the Last Day, to oppose his parents in anything; except if they force you to worship another deity with Allah! Leave alone opposing them on a trivial matter like choosing one’s partner in marriage; Allah has commanded the believers that they should not even say ‘uff’ to them! Allah Subhanah has commanded the believers to treat their parents with great kindness, with humility, and with tenderness; and never ever to rebuke them in anything, but rather, always speak kind words to them and supplicate the Merciful Lord to have mercy on them.

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your Brother in Islam,

Burhan