Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.  (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

AsalaamoAlikum

i have only a question ask, and the question is, does islam really allow us to like someone, will it be considered as a sin? and what are the limits of it in islam?

thank you very much

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Answer:

Does Islam allow relationships

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His  forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is no one (no idol, no person, no grave, no prophet, no imam, no dai, nobody!) worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad(saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

The deen of Islam was sent as a Mercy to all of mankind; and it the duty of every believer to be a sincere well-wisher of his fellow human beings!

We assume when you say ‘does Islam really allow us to like someone’, you mean a non-mehram male-female relationship! Brother, the truth, in light of the Quran and Sunnah is that Islam guides towards the complete segregation of sexes.

Allah Subhanah, Who is the Creator of the human being, and the Creator of everything that exists, is the same Allah Who Created the nature of the human being. And the Laws that He made, are in accordance with the nature of the human being! And each Law, Command, and Guidance of our Lord is based on His Perfect Wisdom and Knowledge.

Men are not allowed to have any kind of illicit relationship with any non-mehram women; and vice-versa! That is purer and better for them. If one forms an illicit and/or secret relationship with a non-mehram person of the opposite sex, it would indeed be considered a grave sin in the sight of Allah.

The nations and societies, and the so-called modern and free peoples of the world, who allow this sort of casual relationship are paying the price for their ignorance! Allah Subhanah has created a natural physical attraction between a man and woman; and if this attraction is not controlled and governed, the results and consequences of these ‘casual’ relationships are absolutely devastating to oneself, his family, his community, and the general well-being of society!

Your Question: what are the limits of it in islam?

The righteous society that Allah wants to create for the believers and a righteous society to thrive in, might seem un-obtainable in this immoral and un-godly world! Allow me to give you an example of the limitations that Allah demands from the righteous men and women in Islam.

Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 33 Surah Ahzaab verse 32:

O Wives of the Prophet! You are not like the other women. If you are God-Fearing, do not talk in a soft voice, lest the man of the diseased heart should cherish false hopes from you; but speak in an unaffected (or business-like) manner.

Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 33 Surah Ahzaab verse 53 (part):

If you (O companions of the Prophet) have to ask the wives of the Prophet for something, ask for it from behind a curtain! This is a better way for the purity of your, as well as their hearts!

Who is Allah Subhanah commanding in the above verse? Allah is commanding some of the most pious and righteous men and women who ever walked on this planet earth, the companions, and the chaste wives of the noble Prophet of Allah (saws), that if the companions were to ask for anything from the noble and chaste wives of the Prophet for something, they should ask for it from behind a veil or a curtain; and if the wives talk to any man, they should talk in a firm and business-like manner. That is a better way, and purer for their hearts!

Thus the limits of a relationship between the non-mehrams of opposite sexes should be that one only talks to a non-mehram, if he/she absolutely has to; and that too in a firm, business-like, and unaffected manner. One is not allowed to have friendships, or make casual talk, or talk loose-talk, with one who is not a mehram. That is a purer and more righteous way for the believers, who sincerely fear Allah and the Last Day.

Most people, who live in this immoral and un-godly society, might find the above commands of Allah too strict and restricting for their liking! But the true believers, who sincerely fear Allah and the Last Day, trust Allah in everything, and know with certainty that Allah only guides towards the Absolute Truth, and know that the norms of this immoral and un-godly society are based on the laws of ignorance!

Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 33 Surah Ahzaab verse 36:

It does not behove a believing man and a believing woman that when Allah and His Messenger have given their decision in a matter, they should exercise an option in that matter of theirs. For whoever disobeys Allah and His Messenger, has indeed strayed into manifest error.

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your Brother in Islam,

Burhan