I need your honest opinion with regards to the duties one has towards Islam, your Husband , and your parents.
Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,
As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)
One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:
Dear Brother Burhan,
May Allah reward you for the noble work you are doing in providing fellow Muslim bretheren with your insight and knowledge on Islam.
I`d like to ask you a question about relationships with your brothers and sisters. I WOULD
PPRECIATE IF YOU COULD JUST USE MY INITIALS ( T.K) IN THE REPLY , SO THAT THE
CONFIDENTIALITY CAN BE MAINTAINED.
My question is:
I have been happily married for 10 years, masha-allah & my husband loves me a lot too, Alhamdo-lillah. However there have been some mis-understandings between him and my younger sister (who married a catholic man , twice her age and who was of a different nationality ) There was tremendous pressure from the family on her , not to do what she was planning to do. However , she still went ahead, converted the man to follow Islam , Alhamdo-lillah , and married him. My husband was very furios about the whole issue and how she hurt my parents etc by doing this. Since that day , he has asked me to cut off complete relations with her . I am asked not to talk to her , discuss her , or even take her name. My parents are also hurt by this , but just so that I do not have any problems with my married life, they do not say inthing in this matter.
I WOULD LIKE TO KNOW THE RIGHT THING FOR ME TO DO. SHOULD I OBEY MY HUSBANDS ORDERS, OR FOLLOW THE RIGHT PATH OF ISLAM , WHERE ONE SHOULD NOT BREAK TIES WITH FAMILY . IF I DISOBEY HIS COMMANDS, WILL I BE A SINNER , FOR NOT OBEYING MY HUSBAND, OR SHOULD I CONSIDER THE OTHER OPTION ? I WANT TO BE ABLE TO SPEAK WITH MY SISTER , BUT I AM FORCED NOT TO DO SO. I need your honest opinion with regards to the duties one has towards Islam, your Husband , and your parents. I wan`t to do the right thing without hurting my Husband or my parents. Your answer means a lot to me. Please help !
Jazak-Allah in advance.
A sister in Islam
(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)
Break relationship with sister
In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 33 Surah Ahzaab verse 6 (part):
Blood-relations amongst each other have closer personal ties in the Decree of Allah….
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 13 Surah Ar-Raad verse 25:
As for those who break their covenant with Allah after confirming it, who cut asunder relationships which Allah has bidden to be joined, and spread chaos on the earth, their’s shall be the curse, and they shall have a wretched abode in the Hereafter.
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Bakarah verse 27:
And He leads astray only those who disobey Allah, who break Allah’s covenant after ratifying it, who cut asunder relationships what Allah has ordered to be joined, and who produce chaos on the Earth. These are indeed the people who are the losers.
Allah Subhanah has given no one the right to break, or demand or conspire to break the blood relations which the Lord Himself has created for mankind…..absolutely regardless of whatever might have transpired in the past, or whatever one fears might happen in the future…..it would be absolutely unlawful, illegal and a grave sin in the Sight of the Lord for your husband to demand that you break relations with your own blood-sister or other relatives!
Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 8.17 Narrated by Abu Huraira
The Prophet (saws) said, "The word 'Ar-Rahm (womb) derives its name from Ar-Rahman (i.e., one of the names of Allah) and Allah said: 'I will keep good relation with the one who will keep good relation with you (the womb, i.e. kith and kin), and sever the relation with him who will sever the relation with you (the womb, i.e. kith and kin).’”
Dear and beloved Sister, absolutely regardless of whatever might have happened, your husband has absolutely no right to demand that you break relations with your own blood-sister…..and even if (Allah forbid) your husband were to make this unlawful demand from you, you are not to obey this unlawful command of his….and there would be absolutely no sin or blame upon you.
Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 3696 Narrated by An-Nawwas ibn Sam'an
Allah's Messenger (saws) said, "A creature is not to be obeyed when it involves disobedience to the Creator."
Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.
Your brother and well wisher in Islam,