Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.  (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

Assalaamu`alaikum.

Dear brother in islam.

I have a problem. Please give me an answer which can make me nearer to Allah.

I am a working married women with 5 children. All my children are studying oversea. I am alone with my husband.

One of my brother who leaves quick far away from town always come to my house and have a nap. One day he took my house key and made an extra key and keep with him. He use to come to my house when I and my husband are out for work and stay in house watching TV and sometimes sleep for hours until we come home. I love my brother and at the same time I don`t like to have someone in the house when I am not in. I dare not tell him direct cause I feel he might be hurt.

Can i and my husband just keep silent and accept him as a visitor who brings rahmat.

Please advice me

(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)

Answer:

Brother comes to house unannonced

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is no one (no idol, no person, no grave, no prophet, no imam, no dai, nobody!) worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 24 Surah Noor verse 27:

27 O ye who believe! Enter not houses other than your own until ye have asked permission and saluted those in them: that is best for you in order that ye may heed (what is seemly).

Beloved Sister, it is neither considered righteousness nor proper for one to make a copy of the house key of another or to enter their house without their prior permission and consent.

But because the one doing so is your own brother, and as long as he does not do anything unlawful in your house in your absence, if you wish you may ignore and overlook the liberty he has taken. As much as you may dislike the liberty your brother has taken regarding your house, if you ignore and disregard it and allow him to continue only so that you do not spoil relations with your brother, there is absolutely no harm and you will have a huge reward for enjoining ties of kinship in the Sight and Presence of Allah Subhanah.

But if the unannounced entering of your brother in your house brings about even the slightest of strains in your relationship with your husband, then you must at the very first opportunity firmly but politely make it known to your brother that his self-claimed liberty regarding your house is not acceptable to you and your husband and it would be best if he would please take permission before entering your house again.

If your brother truly loves you and did what he did in the past only because he erroneously assumed that his entering the house was fine and acceptable to his sister and her husband, he will immediately cease to do so, Insha Allah.

Alternatively you may politely and with extreme tenderness explain your delicate position to your husband; and if your husband accepts and has no issue with the liberty taken by your brother regarding his house, you should overlook and forgive the fault of your brother only for the sake of enjoining ties of kinship with him for the sake and pleasure of Allah Subhanah. It is expected that your Lord will reward you generously for your patience and fortitude, and for striving to preserve the ties of kinship which the Lord has Himself established for you.

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

Burhan