I have one friend who is married, we started up as good friends. I started caring and loving her much once she was pregnant and had a mis-carriage
Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,
As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa
Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)
One of our
brothers/sisters has asked this question:
I have one friend who
is married, we started up as good friends. I started caring and loving her much
once she was pregnant and had a mis-carriage. I made up my mind to keep her
smiling and happy and very soon I gave her the respect i give to my elder
sister and soon she also loved me as his younger brother. But sorry to say that
one day we committed a sin i.e. in my asent mindness i kissed her and touched
her breasts... I feel guilty because till date she is not able to conceive and
i feel that i am the reason for this and almighty is punishing her since she
allowed me to touch her.. Please help me... what shall i do.... I love her very
much and never thought of anything bad of her... I dont know why almighty is
punishing her for my sins..
Please advise?
(There may be some grammatical and
spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from
questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in
confidentiality.)
Answer:
Punishing other for Sins
In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help
and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and
whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness
that there is no one (no idol, no person,
no grave, no prophet, no
imam, no dai, nobody!) worthy of worship but Allah Alone,
and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of
His Messengers.
Dear and Beloved brother, indeed the relationship
between you and the married sister and the unfortunate incident that occurred
are indeed grave and heinous sins in the Sight of Allah Subhanah; thus it
becomes and befits a believer who sincerely fears Allah and the Last Day that
he should turn back to his Lord in repentance and seeking sincere forgiveness
for his deeds. It is expected that he
will find his Lord Forgiving and Merciful.
Whatever deeds one might have done, if one turns to Allah Subhanah in sincere
Taubah and seeks forgiveness, Allah
Subhanah has promised in the Holy Quran that He will forgive all the sins of
such a believer, even if one has
committed the gravest sin of all: ‘Shirk’!
Not only that, our Lord is so
Merciful and Generous, that He not only
will forgive the sins of the believer,
He will change his evil deeds done into good deeds!
The conditions or ways to seek sincere Taubah or
Repentance from the Merciful Lord are:
- One
is aware that he has sinned, and
feels sorry and ashamed at his sin.
- Makes
a solemn covenant and promise with Allah that he will not repeat his sin
again.
- Turns
to Allah and seeks forgiveness,
before he has met with his appointment of death.
- Is
a believer and does righteous good deeds thereafter.
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 39
Surah Zumur verses 53-54:
(O Prophet) say: “O My servants who have
wronged their own souls….Do not despair of Allah’s Mercy! Surely,
Allah forgives all sins. He
indeed is the All Forgiving, All
Merciful. Return to your Lord and
submit to Him before the scourge overtakes you;
for then you may get no help from anywhere.”
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 3
Surah Ale Imraan verse 135-136:
Allah likes such good people very much,
who, if ever they commit a base deed or
wrong their own soul by the commission of a sin, remember Allah instantly, and ask for forgiveness from Him for their
shortcomings. For who, but Allah,
can forgive sins? (And Allah
loves those) who do not knowingly persist in the wrongs they did. These will be rewarded with forgiveness from
Allah, and with Gardens beneath which
canals flow, and they will reside
therein forever! How excellent is the
reward of those who do good deeds!
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 6
Surah Anaam verse 54:
When those come to you who believe in Our
Signs, say: "Peace be on you! Your Lord had inscribed for Himself (the rule
of) Mercy. Verily if any of you did evil
in ignorance, and thereafter repented
and amended (his conduct), Lo! He is
Oft-Forgiving, Most Merciful."
Your Statement: I feel guilty
because till date she is not able to conceive and i feel that i am the reason
for this
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 42
Surah Shura verses 49-50:
49 To Allah belongs the dominion of the heavens and the earth. He creates what He wills (and plans). He bestows (children) male or female
according to His Will (and Plan).
50 Or He bestows both males and females and He leaves barren whom He
will: for He is Full of knowledge and power.
Allah Subhanah bestows the gift of children to whom
He Wills and Pleases, and leaves barren whom He Wills and Pleases.
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 35
Surah Fatir verse 1*:
18 Nor can a bearer of burdens bear another's burden.
Dear and beloved brother, the life on this earth is
but a test and dedicated for the doing of deeds; and the True place for
judgment, rewards and punishments is only in the Hereafter. Besides it is a prescribed and Just Law and
Principle of The Lord Most Just that He will hold accountable only the person
who, of his own free will, committed the deed.
It is against His Principles and Laws of Justice to punish someone else
for another’s error!
In light of the clear guidance of the Glorious
Quran, your feeling that you are the one responsible for the sister being
childless is absolutely unfounded and baseless .
As your brothers and sincere well-wishers in faith
we humbly urge you to fear Allah and leave the married sister alone, as your
forming a relationship with her in any way is not only a grave and heinous sin
in the Sight of Allah Subhanah, but could have dire consequences on her married
life and the relationship with her husband.
Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 4839 Narrated by Ali ibn al-Husayn ;
AbuHurayrah
Allah's Messenger (saws) said,
"Part of a man's good observance of Islam is that he leaves alone what
does not concern him."
Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due
to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only
Source of Strength.
Your brother and well
wisher in Islam,
Burhan