Eat chocolates from friend
Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,
As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's
Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)
One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:
dear brother
assalamu alaikum
i have a small question...i have a friend whom i like very
much...both of us were best frds and we loved each other...but thn since we
thot it wont work out between us...i mean we cant get married n all...we have
decided to stop...he has left the country now...it was me who told him it wont
work bcos of my family situations...i dint want my family to lose face in front
of my other relatives...so we decided we have to stop...we told ourselves that
if we really loved each other we would meet in the next world....
he said ok...he has left the country and we havent talked to each
other for a few days..we decided we will stop it totally very soon since it is
not permitted in islam...
my question is before he left india...he gave me a few chocolates
and some gifts...id also like to tell u this...we are not the type who go
around the city together...we used to chat on the net and then used to talk on
the fone...ive seen him in a few shops and have talked to him directly only 2
or 3 times so far...that too i hardly looked at his face...we were in a public
shop and never have we sat together privatey and had a chat.....anyways i felt
it was rong and we are deciding to call it quits very soon...
my question is...can i eat the chocolates he gave me?...since i
cant give it to any1...either i have to eat it or throw it away...is it ok if i
finish off the chocolates he gave me or shud i throw it away?...it is not
possible for me to give it to any1 as it would arise questions and i would have
to lie to cover up..
another thing is my parents fixed me up with a guy whn i was
hardly 14 yrs old...i still dunno anything bt the person whom im going to
marry...meanwhile i met this guy n liked him a lot...i want to tell my parents
bt him and i know if i stand on 1 foot...theyll agree to the wedding...but thn
they will have to lose face to my other relatives and i dont want that to
happen to my parents,,,i love them n respect them a lot..that is the main
reason i tol him to wait for me mayb in the next world insiha allah....if i go
to heaven....we have decided to do good deeds ...be a good person and then wait
and c wat is waiting for us in the future...everything said n done...i know i
have done a sin...since it is not permitted to talk to a man personally...what
do i do now?...he has nt touched me intentionally even once...we havent even
sat next to each other...but we understood each other really
well...circumstances prevent us
from getting married...
what shud i do now....i will ask sorry for my sins to allah...but
i dont know really how sorry i am...i am sorry that i sinned...but i am happy
that i met this person...bcos both of us have benefitted from knowing each
other...he started praying regularly only after i told him abt the consequences
of not praying...and i started doing extra prayers...i started respecting my
parents more and stopped talking bac to them...after i saw him respect his
parents...he was in a bad state whn i met him...very depressed and about to do
something really bad...i gave him confidence and he is prettyy strong now...so
we have mutually helped each other become a better person...its been 2.5 yrs
since i know him...we both respect each other and
love each other a lot...he is my best frd...
i am going to stop talking to him?...and i am going to ask sorry
allah...but other than that what shud i do?...have i committed a grave
sin....should i throw away the chocolates he gave me??....
will i meet him in my next life...i am a very staunch believer in
the hereafter...
pls advice me...i am very confused
pls send me a mail to my id and let the question be personal...and
pls pls do not copy n paste any other answer uve already sent some1...id like
to have a direct answer,,,
thank u very much brother for this forum...
assalamu alaikum
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Answer:
In the
name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness.
Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray,
none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is no one (no idol, no
person, no grave, no prophet, no imam,
no dai, nobody!) worthy of
worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad(saws) is His
slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.
Dear and
beloved sister in Islam, may Allah Subhanah increase your faith in Him and the
Last Day, and keep you always in His Protection and Mercy. May Allah Subhanah increase your love and
your respect for your parents; and if you have given this sacrifice for the
honor and good will of your parents, rest assured that Allah Subhanah is well
aware of the condition of each of His believing slaves and He is sufficient to
reward His believers from His unending Grace and Mercy.
Allah
Subhanah has kept a natural attraction between the two people who are
non-mehram to each other, and when one meets another and gets to know the
person, it is only natural that one starts to like the other.
In light
of the circumstances narrated by you, it is obvious that both of you like each
other and wish to get married, but due to family circumstances and conditions,
one or both of you think it might not be possible. Under the circumstances you basically are
left with three righteous options:
Tell the
boy you like to talk to his parents or guardians and approach your parents
seeking your hand in marriage. Or
alternatively, you could look for an opportune moment and talk to your parents
about it. These would be the absolute
righteous thing to do.
Since the
boy has left the country, you could condition yourself to the fact that he
might not return to marry you; especially since you have already told him its
not possible.
Or you
could leave the past as the past, and look forward to the future that Allah
Subhanah has Decreed for you. Keep your
full trust in Allah Subhanah, and be constant in your remembrance of Allah
Subhanah and implore Him to guide you and bestow upon you what is best for you
for your life in this world and your Hereafter.
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Baqarah verse 216
(part): But it is possible that ye dislike a thing which is good for
you, and that ye love a thing which is bad for you. But Allah Knows and ye know not.
Your
Question: can i eat the chocolates he gave me?
Regarding
the chocolates he gave you, you can very well accept it as a gift and consume
them.
Your
Question: will i meet him in my next life...i am a very staunch believer in the
hereafter...
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 50 Surah Qaaf verse 35: There
they (the men and women of
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 25 Surah Furqan verses 15-16: Ask
them, “Is this (the Fire) better, or the everlasting gardens which have been
promised to the God-fearing, righteous
people (men and women)?”. That will be
the recompense of their good deeds and the final destination of their
journey, wherein, they will get everything they desire, and wherein they will dwell forever. This is a promise which your Lord has taken
upon Himself to fulfill.
Beloved
sister in Islam, Allah Subhanah has promised that He will give the fortunate
dwellers of
Whatever
written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance,
and whatever of error is of me. Allah
Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.
Your Brother in Islam,
Burhan
Wister