Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.  (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

These questions were forwarded to me by a brother and i have been unable to come up with proper answers. please shed some light on them. JazakAllah Khair. Omer "1- Please let me know that what are the limits of sexual relations in a married life between both partners ? 2- Can husband kiss and suck the breasts of his wife ? 3- Is it fair to kiss & lick the secret part ( vagina/pussy) of the wife ? 4- Can a husband offer his wife to suck his penis ? 5- Can a husband suck & drink milk of his wife after her pregnancy ?" 

(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)

Answer:

Limits of sexual relations in a maried life between both partners

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is no one (no idol, no person, no grave, no prophet, no imam, no dai, nobody!) worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

Your question: Please let me know that what are the limits of sexual relations in a married life between both partners?

What we can do for you here, without going into too much detail, is list the few things that are forbidden. As is the principle with the concept of haraam in Islam, everything that which is not listed as haraam is considered legal for the believers.

Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Baqarah verse 222:They ask you about the (women’s) monthly courses. Say, “It is a state of impurity; so keep apart from the women during their monthly courses and do not approach them until they are clean. When they have cleansed themselves, then you may go to them in the manner ordained for you by Allah. Most surely Allah loves those people who refrain from evil and keep themselves pure and clean.

The things which Allah and His Messenger have specifically forbidden in a sexual relationship between husband and wife is:

Anal sex.

Having sexual intercourse with the wife during her menses.

Some scholars have also voiced their opinion against touching either of the partner’s sex organs with the mouth. But because nothing is mentioned in the Quran and Sunnah, the scholars have not said it is forbidden… The most they have said is that one should fear Allah and stay away from this act as it is considered impure, unclean and unhealthy, and thus disliked.

Other than this, the husband and wife have all the liberty with regarding to sex in their relationship.

Rather than list all the things which are allowed, we will try to clear a few misconception which are commonly held. If other than these, you have any particular questions or doubts regarding the sexual relationship between husband and wife, you are welcome to write back to us, and we will try our best to answer them to the best of our ability.

Please note again, that other than the above three things mentioned as forbidden, the partners have all the liberty in regards to sex.

There is absolutely no restriction regarding positions… lying down, sitting, standing, whatever.

There is no ‘purdah’ or veil between the husband and wife in Islam.

Touching all parts of the body is legal.

When the women is in her menses period, only her ‘private’ part is not to be touched or entered, and should be kept covered. Other than that, the partners are free to enjoy their relationship during this period.

Your question: Can husband kiss and suck the breasts of his wife ?

There is absolutely no restriction in Islam for the husband to touch, fondle, kiss, suck, etc. the breasts of his wife, if he wishes to do so.

Your question:Is it fair to kiss & lick the secret part ( vagina/pussy) of the wife ? Your question:Can a husband offer his wife to suck his penis ?

Although this act is not in the list of the prohibited in Islam, almost all the scholars in Islam are unanimous that the sexual organs of the male and female are unlean, unhealthy, and impure, and should not be touched with the mouth of the believing man and woman. The scholars are of the opinion that there is absolutely no restrictions in touching the organs with the hands, but the mouth, wherewith a believer recites the Quran and does the Dhikr or remembrance of Allah Subhanah, must not be subjugated to such unclean places.

Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 7 Surah Aaraat verse 157:(So, now mercy has been assigned to those) who follow this Messenger, the Gentile Prophet, whose mention they shall find in the Torah and the Gospel with them. He enjoins them to do good and forbids them from evil; he makes pure things lawful for them and impure things unlawful; he relieves them of their burdens and frees them from the shackles (of rites and rituals) that bound them. For this reason, those alone who believe in him, support him, succour him, and follow the Light that has been sent down with him shall attain true ‘success’.

We definitely cannot say it is haraam, because this specific act is not included in the list of haraam or forbidden things in sex by Allah and His Messenger (saws). The most one can say is that it is unclean, impure, unhealthy and thus disliked, and if one wants to stay pure on his faith, he should try and abstain from it.

Your question: Can a husband suck & drink milk of his wife after her pregnancy ?" 

There is no harm if the husband (accidentally) drinks the milk of his wife after her pregnancy. Although, in Islam, if one drinks the milk of a woman, that woman becomes illegal for him to marry…. But the scholars of Islam are unanimous in their opinion, that this condition only applies if one drinks the milk of a woman like his mother, or another woman, in his infancy and childhood … and not when he is an adult.

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your Brother in Islam,

Burhan