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Quran does not address women: My daughter was following islam, praying namaz,( ofcourse not regularly) and doing rozas dutifully every year

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

Salaams,

I have tried accessing your web site but in vain. today i got ur e mail address so would like to clarify some questions.

My daughter was following islam, praying namaz,( ofcourse not regularly) and doing rozas dutifully every year. she has always had questions since many years regarding a lot of traditions and other things about the religion, but still followed it coz i , and elders kept saying that she would gradually understand.  she studied culture studies, and sociology and did masters in english literature. she basically did course on feminism too as part of her post graduation.  with all this knowledge she concluded that all religions are just politically driven . she then started reading the quran in english and her questions increased all the more. i tried to find answers from various sources but none were convincing for her.

She is now working for a news paper as journalist and covering culture and communities and so comes in contact with various people from different fields.

 i ask these questions to you now...

1. islam may be giving the best advantage to women COMPARED  to other religions, but is still biased.  the quran is addressed directly to either mankind or to men alone.  no where is it addressed directly to women alone.

2. for every male witness, two female witnesses are required.   why?

3. why are men allowed 4 wives?

4. surah al nisa says....to beat ur wife if she rebels or commits adultery. where is the verse saying to do the same to husband for his adultery?

5. why iddat for women when pregnancy is not an issue?

6. a woman whose husband has abondoned her but communicates on phone at intervals cannot consider him dead, or get divorce..yet she cant remarry?  this she is asking coz she came across such a case.

She concludes that if these are written in quran then it is not the text from allah as allah cannot discriminate between genders.  so she has quit islam and just prays to the creator in english. she belives that first religion is of humanity and being a good human being is all that matters.

Hoping to receive a reply...

(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)

Answer:

 

Quran does not address women

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

Q-1. islam may be giving the best advantage to women COMPARED  to other religions, but is still biased .  the quran is addressed directly to either mankind or to men alone.  no where is it addressed directly to women alone.

The Lord Most Gracious did not send a separate Quran for men and a separate Quran for women, but rather send His Book of Guidance for all mankind!  Thus, more often than not the Quran addresses mankind, both men and women, or believers and disbelievers, both men and women, in general.

Having said that The Lord Most High has addressed mankind in general, there are several instances where Allah Subhanah addresses a specific woman or group of women.just as He addresses a specific man or a group of men!

Here are only a few examples:

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chaper 33 Surah Ahzaab Verse 30:

O Wives of the Prophet! If any of you were guilty of evident unseemly conduct the Punishment would be doubled to you and that is easy for Allah.

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chaper 33 Surah Ahzaab Verse 32:

O Wives of the Prophet! Ye are not like any of the (other) women: if ye do fear (Allah) be not too complaisant of speech lest one in whose heart is a disease should be moved with desire: but speak ye a speech (that is) just.

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chaper 3 Surah Ale Imran Verse 42:


Behold! The angels said: "O Mary! Allah hath chosen thee and purified thee; chosen thee above the women of all nations.

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chaper 3 Surah Ale Imran Verse 45:

Behold! The Angels said "O Mary! Allah giveth thee glad tidings of a Word from Him: his name will be Christ Jesus the son of Mary held in honor in this world and the Hereafter and of (the company of) those nearest to Allah.

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chaper 19 Surah Maryam Verse 27:

At length she (Mary) brought the (babe Jesus) to her people carrying him (in her arms). They said: "O Mary! Truly an amazing thing hast thou brought!

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chaper 3 Ale Imran Verse 43:

"O Mary! Worship thy Lord devoutly; prostrate thyself and bow down (in prayer) with those who bow down."

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chaper 28 Surah Qasas Verse 7:

So We sent this inspiration to the mother of Moses: "Suckle (thy child) but when thou hast fears about him cast him into the river but fear not nor grieve: for We shall restore him to thee and We shall make him one of Our Messengers."

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chaper 33 Surah Ahzaab Verse 35:

For Muslim men and women for believing men and women for devout men and women for true men and women for men and women who are patient and constant for men and women who humble themselves for men and women who give in charity for men and women who fast (and deny themselves) for men and women who guard their chastity and for men and women who engage much in Allah's praise for them has Allah prepared forgiveness and great reward.

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chaper 33 Surah Ahzaab Verse 36:

It is not fitting for a believing man or believing woman when a matter has been decided by Allah and His Messenger to have any option about their decision: if anyone disobeys Allah and His Messenger they are indeed on a clearly Wrong Path.

Your Question: .no where is it addressed directly to women alone.

To claim that no where is the Quran addressed directly to women alone is not an accurate statement at all!!!

Q-2. for every male witness, two female witnesses are required.   why?

Allah Says in the Glorious Quran Chapter 3 Surah Ale Imraan verse 36 (part):

and the male is not like the female!

Allah Subhanah declares in His Glorious Quran that the male is not like the female.

It would absolutely incorrect and unfair for a society to treat as equal what the Creator has declared as unequal!  The so called modern-educated but ignorant and un-Godly societies which have tried to challenge and reverse the bestowed nature and declare the men and women as equal have paid an enormous price in the forming of their families, in their homes, and in their lives! 

Contrary to popular belief,  men and women are not created equal by the All-Wise, All Knowing Lord;  but rather, they are balanced!  For the test period of this one transitory life, each has been given a set of duties and responsibilities by Allah Subhanah best suited according to their bestowed nature.  Thus Allah Subhanah has decreed a separate but balanced test for the man and the woman in the life of this world, each according to its bestowed nature. 

To claim that men and women are absolutely equal is as foolhardy as to claim that a kilo of apples is equal to a kilo of oranges!!!  They are balanced, but they are definitely not equal!!!

The societies which have propagated the equality amongst the sexes have obviously not understood the nature of the man and the woman like the One Who Created their nature!  The Creator has bestowed on the man and the woman balance so that they may complement each other; but the ignorant and un-Godly society insist on making them equal so that they may compete against each other!  Thus for them to declare equality when the Creator has declared them balanced is outright incorrect and unfair!

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Baqarah verse 282:

282 O ye who believe!  When ye deal with each other in transactions involving future obligations in a fixed period of time reduce them to writing.  Let a scribe write down faithfully as between the parties: let not the scribe refuse to write as Allah has taught him so let him write.  Let him who incurs the liability dictate but let him fear his Lord Allah and not diminish aught of what he owes.  If the party liable is mentally deficient or weak or unable himself to dictate let his guardian dictate faithfully.  And get two witnesses out of your own men and if there are not two men then a man and two women such as ye choose for witnesses so that if one of them errs the other can remind her.  The witnesses should not refuse when they are called on (for evidence).  Disdain not to reduce to writing (your contract) for a future period whether it be small or big: it is juster in the sight of Allah more suitable as evidence and more convenient to prevent doubts among yourselves; but if it be a transaction which ye carry out on the spot among yourselves there is no blame on you if ye reduce it not to writing.  But take witnesses whenever ye make a commercial contract; and let neither scribe nor witness suffer harm.  If ye do (such harm) it would be wickedness in you.  So fear Allah; for it is Allah that teaches you.  And Allah is well acquainted with all things.

The bestowed nature of women is such that she is blessed by her Creator with much more emotions and compassion than the men, and the Lord Most Gracious, in His Mercy and Grace, has not saved her from being put in a situation of undue trial by being called for as a witness, where one has to state and relate the absolute truth and facts devoid of any partiality, leanings, emotion or compassion. 

If there are men witnesses available, one should not call upon the women to bear witness to the financial contract; but in a situation where one is unable to assemble two male witnesses, Islam has permitted that two women may be called as witness and the wisdom behind this Command is related by none other than the One Who is All-Knowing, All-Wise:  so that if one of them errs the other can remind her.

It is only in specific situations like financial transactions where the Lord has guided that two female witnesses may be brought forth as against one male witness; but in all other civil or criminal cases where a witness is required like murder, theft, rape, adultery, slander, etc., Shariah Law would accept the witness of one women equivalent to the witness of one man

Q-3. why are men allowed 4 wives?

http://www.islamhelpline.net/node/9036

Q-4. surah al nisa says....to beat ur wife if she rebels or commits adultery. where is the verse saying to do the same to husband for his adultery?

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chaper 4 Surah Nisaa Verse 34:

Men are the protectors and maintainers of women, because God has given the one more (strength) than the
other, and because they support them from their means. Therefore the righteous women are devoutly obedient, and guard in (the husband's)absence what Allah would have them guard. As to those women on whose part ye fear disloyalty and ill-conduct, admonish them (first), (next) refuse to share their beds, (and last) beat them (lightly); but if they return to obedience, seek not against them Means (of annoyance): For Allah is Most High, Great (above you all).

The above aayah of Surah Nisa has been a mode of challenge for many of the non-believers, who challenge the Quran and the deen of Islam.   They have always used this aayah to prove to the world that Islam allows the subjugation and abuse of women.   But that is far from the truth, in the context of the Holy Quran and in the context of the wisdom of Islam.

Now to explain the wisdom behind this much challenged verse of the Holy Quran,  where Allah has allowed a husband to lightly beat his wife,  if he fears open rebellion from her.

In the above aayah,  Allah gives guidance about the characteristics of a virtuous and righteous woman.   She is obedient to her husband (as long as the boundaries set by Allah are honored).  She guards her rights of chastity for her husband.   She guards the husbands property and children and the house in his absence.   And she does all this under the care and watch of Allah, provided she is a God-Fearing person.

But if the husband fears that the wife is transgressing the boundaries of Allah,  Allah has given him 4 options,  3 of which are mentioned in the above aayah.

Option 1:  Admonish them.   Basically means guide them,  talk to them,  advice them,  and let them know that they are transgressing the boundaries set by Allah and His Messenger (saws).   The scholars are of the opinion,  that it is not enough that they should be admonished once,  but one must be merciful and give them plenty of time to realize their mistake,  and come back to the guidance of Allah and His Messenger (saws).

Option 2: Keep them apart from your beds.   Basically means,  that after talking to them and guiding them several times,  and the wife still does not listen,  then as an extreme measure,  and a clear sign of your disappointment with them,  punish them (and oneself) by not having intimate relations with them.   Because sometimes,  it might happen,  that the wife might think that the husband is not serious about his admonition and that he might back off at a later stage,  and she does not comply.   To let her know that he is serious about this particular issue, the husband should exercise this option.

In most cases,  if the woman is God Fearing and loves the husband and the marriage,  one need not ever to go beyond this option.   But only in extreme cases,  the men are allowed to use option 3 and 4.

Option 3:  Beat her.   After going through the motions of admonishing her, and even keeping her away from their beds, and the wife is still in defiance,  then Allah has recommended as a final resort,  to beat her lightly.   That does not in any way mean that the husband is  allowed to abuse the wife and beat her black and blue.  It is more of a symbolic, light beating (and never on the face),  but rather on the back,  as a sign of the husbands ultimate displeasure.   The one and only intention and wisdom behind the guidance is so that the marriage can be saved.

And finally, Option 4:  Divorce.   This is absolutely the last resort, but just look at the mercy of Allah here.   The Islamic way to give divorce is after one has tried and lost hope that any of the above three options will work,  one initiates the final step of divorce.  And here too, the husband is recommended to give 1-divorce first.   Then wait for 3 monthly periods.  During this time, the wife still stays with the husband so that a compromise is reached and the marriage is saved.  

All these options are given, so that the sanctity,  sacredness, and unity of marriage is maintained.  It may happen in a marriage that an issue becomes deadlocked between husband and wife. More often than not, the issue can be solved if both the partners desire a solution and seek a  compromise in the admonition stage.   If the issue ever does go beyond this stage to option 2, that should solve the issue.   Option 3 is absolutely optional,  and one does not have to beat his wife to obtain a divorce!   But if the woman is still not relenting after option 2, chances are the matter might eventually end up in divorce anyways!

Q-5. why iddat for women when pregnancy is not an issue?

Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Baqarah verse 234:

If those of you,  who die,  leave wives behind;  they should abstain (from marriage) for four months and ten days.   Then,  when their waiting term expires,  they are free to do whatever they choose for themselves,  provided that it is decent.   You shall not be answerable for this.   Allah is fully aware of what all of you do.

Although there are many wisdoms behind the waiting period for the women, the main reason is to make sure that she is not pregnant with the child of the deceased;  as it immediately effects the inheritance of the heirs.   Yes, someone might argue that today there are technological advances and this can be determined in minutes.    In Islam,  some things are announced publicly so that everyone is convinced about the fact,  and there is no room for anyone to start a slander, and thus hurt the reputation and honor of a believer.    Thus even if with the help of technology today we can determine whether the woman is pregnant or not,  it becomes almost impossible for everyone to come and see the certificate that the widow is indeed not pregnant.  

As much as the primary wisdom of the prescribed period of iddah in Islam is to determine the lineage, a secondary wisdom is also to allow the widow time to mourn the separation of the one she was bonded to in the sacred relationship of marriage.  Islam guides that the widow manifest her solemn grief of the separation of one as close as a husband by not beautifying herself, nor adorning herself with brightly colored or new clothes, nor applying make-up, nor using perfumes, nor applying henna, etc. for prescribed period.

We wish to reiterate here that the primary wisdom behind the command of observing the iddah or waiting period is to make it absolutely clear that the widow is not carrying the child of the deceased in her womb.  That is precisely why although the prescribed period of iddah is determined at four months and ten days, if the widow is indeed pregnant, her iddah period ends the moment she delivers the baby..be it one day after the death of her husband, or full nine months!!!

Q-6. a woman whose husband has abondoned her but communicates on phone at intervals cannot consider him dead, or get divorce..yet she cant remarry?  this she is asking coz she came across such a case.

If a husband has indeed abandoned his wife, or if a husband does not fulfill his prescribed responsibilities like providing for his wife and his children, or if the husband is abusive and does not honor and respect his wife as is his duty, the wife is well within her rights to initiate a divorce proceedings against her husband and seek her freedom from such an irresponsible and impious man.

The Statement: .she concludes that if these are written in quran then it is not the text from allah as allah cannot discriminate between genders.  so she has quit islam and just prays to the creator in english. she belives that first religion is of humanity and being a good human being is all that matters.

There is obviously no compulsion on anyone to accept Islam.  If your daughter wishes to quit Islam, she is well within her rights to do so..but she must realize that even if all of mankind were to leave this deen with her, it would make absolutely no difference to the Exalted Rank and Status of the Lord Most High in the very least! 

Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 18 Surah Kahf verse 29:

Proclaim, This (Quran) is the Truth from your Lord:  now whosoever wills may accept it, and whosoever wills may reject it. (As for those who reject it) We have prepared for such workers of iniquity a Fire whose flames have encircled them.  There, if they ask for water ,  they will be given a drink like the dregs of oil,  which will burn their mouths!  What an evil drink, and what an evil abode!

The loss is hers alone to bear!!!

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allahs Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone.  Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

 

Burhan

 


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