Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

Salam, I am a 20 year old girl, i got married back home. We did the paper work, and had a small wedding party, but that was it, we did not do the nikah. He came to America and never came to me. iam stuck.. i don`t know if i am married or not. I went to the masjid but they were too busy.. and they just kept on loosing my information.. I just gave up. At this moment iam going through very hard time. Its too hard for me by myself. I am young and want to have a future and a family. So please help me with what i should do. 

(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)

Answer:

Married or not

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

If the following four absolutely obligatory conditions of a ‘nikaah’ or marriage were honored, the marriage would be considered valid and lawful in the Sight of Allah Subhanah, in the sight of Shariah Law, and in the sight of the believing society. If even one of the four absolutely obligatory conditions of the ‘nikaah’ or marriage were violated, the marriage will be considered null and void in the Sight of the Lord.

1. Proposal by one party and acceptance by the other.
2. The determination of the ‘mehr’.
3. The presence of (at least) two witnesses to the marriage contract.
4. The consent of the parents/guardians of the bride.

Your Question:i don`t know if i am married or not.

Respected sister, if the above four obligatory conditions of the ‘nikaah’ or marriage were honored, absolutely regardless whether the contract was written and documented or only verbal, your marriage will be considered absolutely lawful and valid in the Sight of Allah Subhanah and in the Sight of Shariah Law.

If your husband has ‘disappeared’, or if for any reason whatsoever you want to free yourself from the marriage, you would need to initiate a divorce proceedings against your husband in a Shariah Court; and the Shariah Judge is well within his rights to grant a divorce in your marriage.

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

Burhan