Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

I want to know what is the responsibility and duties of a married men to her Wifes` & her parents?

I want to know what is the responsibility and duties of a married man to his wife`s parents? Is Quran says any thing about this subject? And what is the punishments Allah will give if he fail to do his commitments to his wife and her parents.

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Answer:

Husband duties in-laws

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

In light of the guidance of the Quran and the Sunnah, the husband and the wife both have absolutely no prescribed duties or responsibilities laid upon them by Islam towards their ‘in-laws’, including the parents-in-law, brothers-in-law, sisters-in-law, uncles or aunts-in-law, etc. The responsibility and duty that Islam has prescribed and laid upon the believing husband/wife is only towards their own blood relatives, their spouses, their children, etc.

Having said that the husband/wife both have absolutely no responsibility prescribed towards their in-laws in Shariah does not in any way mean or imply that one is allowed to be rude, or disrespectful, or dishonor their in-laws in any way. Both the husband and the wife must at all times strive to develop cordial relations with their in-laws.

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 35 Surah Furqaan verse 54:

54 It is He (Allah) Who has created man from water: then has He established relationships through blood and (through) marriage (ie:in-laws): for thy Lord has Power (over all things).

But if the believing husband/wife, of their own free will, serves their in-laws, they would be doing a deed of ‘ehsaan’, a deed which would be over and above their prescribed duties and responsibilities; and Allah Subhanah has time and again declared in the Glorious Quran that He absolutely loves those believers who do ‘ehsaan’ or deeds which are over and above their role of duty and responsibility.

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 3 Surah Ale-Imraan verse 134 (part):

134 …. for Allah loves the ‘muhsineen’ (those who do deeds over and above their call of duty).

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 3 Surah Ale-Imraan verse 148:

148 And Allah gave them a reward in this world and the excellent reward of the Hereafter. For Allah loves the ‘muhsineen’ (those who do deeds over and above their call of duty).

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Baqarah verse 195 (part):

195 … and do ‘ehsaan’; for Allah loves the ‘muhsineen’ (those who do deeds over and above their call of duty).

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 5 Surah Maidah verse 93 (part):

93 ….. For Allah loves the ‘muhsineen’ (those who do deeds over and above their call of duty).

Thus in conclusion, both the wife and the husband in Islam are absolutely under no obligation to take care or serve their in-laws; the duty and ultimate responsibility that the parents or relatives are served and well cared for is entirely upon their respective blood relatives and spouses.

If one is blessed with a spouse who does ‘ehsaan’ and serves their in-laws, the other spouse should be extremely grateful and thankful to them for their superb gesture of benevolence and kindness.

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

Burhan