Changing my daughter's last name after divorce
Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,
As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)
One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:
As Salam Alakum, I have a really important question regarding my child. I am divorce and I have a 3 year old daughter, her father left us right after her birth and never returns back. I waited for 2 years and try to contact him but all he did is ignore us and no response for any think. He never pays any child support or financial support towards her daughter; he never calls to find out how is she, even when I file for a divorce (khula) in court and he never response for any legal documents and never show in the court. I live in USA so according to the US law I waited 6 months for any response from him, but unfortunately he never response back to anything. So after waited for 6 month they gave me a full custody of my child. I even try through our imam and he even try to contact him but same response he picked his calls and then hang up on him every time he try to talk about our marriage. So even he said the same thing that this marriage is not going to go anywhere so it’s better for me to take a khula. I did that and my iddat as well; my question is here is in Islam am I allowed to change my daughters last name to my last name, or is it haram to do that. He completely denied her as her daughter in public. Although Allah knows the best that he is her real father. But it’s really upsets and hurt to know that he doesn’t consider her as his daughter. He has his other 3 children from previous marriage and all he told everyone that he has 3 kids. I am very confused because I don’t want my daughter get confused about her and my different last name. Please let me know if I am allowed to do that. Also when I told to few people , someone make a comment that if I will do this then everyone is going to think that this child is illegal because she will have my last name then her father’s last name and no one is going to marry her. I am much stressed and sad to think about my daughter that why she has to go through with that, why Allah chose her to go through with all this. Please help me. May Allah Subhana Allah bless you with all his blessings Ameen. Jazak Allah Khair
(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)
Answer:
In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 33 Surah Ahzaab verses 4-5:
…Allah has not made your adopted sons your real sons. These are the things which you utter from your mouths, but Allah says what is based on reality; and He Alone guides to the
Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.
Your brother and well wisher in Islam,
Members of Islamhelpline
Wister