Wife accomodation seperate divorce.
Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,
As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.
(May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)
One of our brothers/sisters has asked
this question:
Assalaamwaleikum,
I would please like to ask you the following questions:
1.Can a man divorce his wife on the basis that she does not want to live in the
same house with his mother, who openly does shirk, non-islamic behaviour and
kuffar,in various aspects of daily life?
2. What is the position/rights of a daughter-in-law in islam with regards to
her husband and in-laws?
I would truly appreciate all your kind help and advice in the light of Islam
and Hadith.
Ma-Salaam.
(There may be some grammatical and spelling
errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from
questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in
confidentiality.)
Answer:
Wife accomodation
seperate divorce
In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His
help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide,
and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear
witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear
witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.
Your
Question: What is the position/rights of a daughter-in-law in islam with
regards to her husband and in-laws?
In light of the guidance of the Quran and the Sunnah, the
wife has absolutely no duty and responsibility laid upon her by Islam towards her
husband’s family or ‘in-laws’, including the husband’s parents, brothers,
sisters, uncles, aunts, etc. The
responsibility and duty that Islam has laid upon the believing wife is only
towards making sure that her husband is pleased and satisfied with her in every
aspect of her life!
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 4 Surah
Nisaa verse 34:
34 Men are the protectors and maintainers of women because Allah has
given the one more than the other, and because they support them from their
means. Therefore the righteous
women are devoutly obedient and guard in (the husband's) absence what Allah
would have them guard (their modesty and chastity, the honor and
property of their husband, etc.)
Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 286 Narrated by Umm Salamah
The Prophet (saws) said: ‘If a woman dies
while her husband was pleased with her, she will enter
Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 3272 Narrated by Abu Hurayrah
When Allah's Messenger (saws) was asked which
woman was best he replied, "The one who pleases (her husband) when he
looks at her, obeys him when he gives a command, and does not go against his
wishes regarding her person or property by doing anything of which he
disapproves."
Thus, in essence, if a believing woman worships Allah
Subhanah as He Alone deserves to be worshipped, preserves her chastity, and
strives to the best of her ability to please her husband, the Messenger of
Allah (saws) declared that she will be given the honor to enter the
Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 3254 Narrated by Anas ibn Malik
Allah's Messenger (saws) said, "When a
woman observes the five times of prayer, fasts during Ramadan, preserves her
chastity and obeys her husband, she may enter by any of the gates of
Having said that she has absolutely no responsibility
towards her husband’s family or her in-laws, does not in any way mean or imply
that she is allowed to be rude, or disrespectful, or dishonor them in any
way. She must at all times strive to
develop cordial relations with her in-laws.
But if the believing woman does, of her own free will,
serves the parents or family of her husband, she would be doing a deed of
‘ehsaan’, a deed which would be over and above her prescribed duties and
responsibilities; and Allah Subhanah has time and again declared in the
Glorious Quran that He absolutely loves those believers who do ‘ehsaan’ or
deeds which are over and above their role of duty and responsibility.
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 3 Surah
Ale-Imraan verse 134 (part):
134 …. for Allah loves the ‘muhsineen’ (those who do deeds over and
above their call of duty).
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 3 Surah
Ale-Imraan verse 148:
148 And Allah gave them a reward in this world and the excellent reward
of the Hereafter. For Allah loves the
‘muhsineen’ (those who do deeds over and above their call of duty).
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah
Baqarah verse 195 (part):
195 … and do ‘ehsaan’; for Allah loves the ‘muhsineen’ (those who do
deeds over and above their call of duty).
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 5 Surah
Maidah verse 93 (part):
93 ….. For Allah loves the
‘muhsineen’ (those who do deeds over and above their call of duty).
The wife in Islam is absolutely under no obligation to
take care or serve her husband’s parents or family; the duty and ultimate
responsibility that the parents are served and well cared for is entirely upon
the direct off-spring of the parents.
But if the wife, of her own will and choice, wishes to go
over and above her prescribed duties and in her benevolence serves the parents
and/or family members of her husband, she would be doing the extremely
meritorious deed of ‘ehsaan’; and Allah Subhanah absolutely loves those who do
‘ehsaan’ or deeds over and above their prescribed duties.
If a husband is blessed with a wife who does ‘ehsaan’ and
serves his parents, he should be extremely grateful and thankful to her for her
superb gesture of benevolence and kindness over and above her prescribed duties
and responsibilities.
Your
Question: Can a man divorce his wife on the basis that she does not want to
live in the same house with his mother, who openly does shirk, non-islamic
behaviour and kuffar,in various aspects of daily life?
If for whatever reason the wife in Islam does not wish to
live with her in-laws, she is well within her rights in Shariah to ask her
husband to provide a separate and distinct accommodation for her; and if Allah
Subhanah has blessed the husband with the means, he should comply with this
lawful demand of his wife and provide for a separate accommodation for her.
The right the wife in Islam does not have in the least is
to demand that her husband leave his parents and move in with her in her
separate accommodation; for it remains the duty of the son to serve and arrange
to provide for his parents until they are alive. The decision to whether live with his parents
and serve and provide for them, or live with his wife and continue to serve and
provide for his parents from there is entirely upto the husband alone.
Although a divorce pronounced by the husband upon his wife
for whatever reason whatsoever will be absolutely legal and binding in Shariah,
for a husband to divorce his wife only because she chooses to exercise her
lawful option to demand for a separate accommodation would not be considered
piety and righteousness on the part of the husband in the Sight of Allah
Subhanah.
If one trusts, obeys, and follows the guidance and
commands of Allah and His Messenger (saws),
one can be assured of never ever being misled; but if one believes, obeys and follows any
other guidance, other than that of Allah and His Messenger (saws), one can be
assured of being led astray.
Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only
due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me
alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is
the Only Source of Strength.
Your brother and
well wisher in Islam,
Burhan
Wister