Contact with ex divorced wife.
Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,
As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)
One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:
My dear brother
My husband have been divorced from his non muslim ex wife for a number of years. We have been married but lately i see that there is constant contact (like everyday - two or three times a day) that they speak to each other. I have always had a problem with this woman as she has shown signs of evil and also is taking these children to church and having them eat un halal foods. Can you give me the islamic law according to Shariah how is he suppose to be in contact with her.
We have gotten into a lot of fights in the past for this woman and I dont think I will be able to talk about what he is doing. We have also made the intention to make hajj this year and I am afraid of my ill feelings towards him right now.
He also hides the messages and the calls that is made from her to him and sometimes the ones that are made from him to her. I would really like some hlep on this. Jazak Allah Khair
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Contact with ex divorced wife
In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.
Once a divorce has been established in the marriage, the ex-husband and the ex-wife are absolute non-mehrams to each other, and every single restriction that applies in Islam to a non-mehram member of the opposite sex would apply to them.
Islam does not prohibit one from talking with a non-mehram member of the opposite sex if one has an absolutely genuine need, but one must fear Allah, fulfill the talk or the transaction in an absolute business-like manner, and honor all the restrictions of hijaab which apply in Shariah. But to talk vain talk, or associate or develop an unlawful relationship with a non-mehram member of the opposite sex would be in absolute violation of the Laws and Boundaries of Islam.
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 49 Surah Hujuraat verse 12:
12 O ye who believe! Avoid suspicion as much (as possible): for suspicion in some cases is a sin.
If your husband has children from his previous marriage, there might be times where he might need to conversate with his ex-wife for their needs or upbringing; thus sister, unless and until there is a genuine cause to be alarmed or suspicious, you should also avoid being overly suspicious as that would effect your relationship with your husband. The husband should fear Allah and His Day of Accounting and keep his conversation with his ex-wife on a strictly business-like and a genuine cause basis only; and you too should fear Allah, and not allow the Shaytaan to sow seeds of discord and undue suspicion into your relationship with your husband.
Beloved Sister, keep your faith and trust in the Power of your Lord Most Gracious, remain constant in your supplications towards Him, recite the Muawidaat (113th Surah Al-Falaq and 114th Surah An-Naas) as often as you can or is easy for you, beseech your Lord to make your trial easy for you, and grant you the patience and the wisdom to overcome this unpleasant and temporary phase in your marriage.
Beloved Sister, in our humble opinion, as much as the behavior of your husband might be on the borderline of what is lawful and unlawful; it would not be prudent to take any concrete action based merely on suspicion and fear as that would have a direct and detrimental effect in the sacred relationship of marriage.
Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allahs Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.
Your brother and well wisher in Islam,