Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

Assalamualaikum.

I love a girl. she is a muslim too. her parents do not agree to my proposal cause we are from completely different culture and tradition and so we have decided to part ways.

My Question: In my prayers, can i ask Allah to have a change in heart in her parents heart, so that they accept my proposal and we get married.

Sajid Kader

(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)

Answer:

Lawful supplication

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Baqarah verse 186:

And if My servants ask you, O Prophet, concerning Me, tell them that I am quite near to them. I hear and answer the prayer of the suppliant, when he calls on Me. So let them respond to My call and believe in Me. (Convey this to them), perhaps they may be guided aright!

The All Knowing, All Wise Allah knows what is good and what is bad for us; therefore, if one asks for something good, Allah will give him/her one of three things:

1.      Allah will give the believer what he/she has supplicated for.

2.      If what the believer is asking is not good or harmful for the believer in this world, Allah will store it for him for the world of the Hereafter.

3.      If what the believer is asking is not good or harmful for the believer in this world, Allah will turn away from the believer an equivalent amount of evil.

Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 2257 Narrated by Abu Sa'id al-Khudri

The Prophet (saws) said, "Any Muslim who makes a supplication containing nothing which is sinful, or which involves breaking ties of relationship, will be given for it by Allah one of three things: He will give him swift answer, or store it up for him in the next world, or turn away from him an equivalent amount of evil." Those who heard it said they would then make many supplications and he (saws) replied that Allah was more ready to answer than they were to ask.

Nu'man b. Bashir reported that the Prophet (saws), said, "Verily supplication is worship."

Narrated by Ahmad and Sunan.

Abu Hurairah reported, "The Prophet (saws) said, "Nothing is more dear to Allah than one's supplication to Him.''

Narrated by Tirmidhi and Ibn Majah.

Ibn Mas'ud reported that the Prophet (saws), said, "If any servant of Allah afflicted with distress or grief makes this supplication, his supplication will be accepted: 'O Allah, I am Your servant, son of Your servant, son of your maidservant. My forehead is in Your hand. Your command conceming me prevails, and Your decision concerning me is just. I call upon You by every one of the beautiful names by which You have described Yourself, or which You have revealed in Your book, or have taught anyone of Your creatures, or which You have chosen to keep in the knowledge of the unseen with You, to make the Qur'an the delight of my heart, the light of my breast, and remover of my griefs, sorrows, and afflictions'." A supplication in these words will be answered. Allah will remove one's affliction and replace it with joy and happiness.

Salman reported that the Prophet (saws), said, "Your Lord, the Blessed and the Exalted One, is Modest and Generous, and He loathes to turn away His servant empty-handed when he raises his hands to Him in supplication."

Narrated by Ahmad and Ibn Hibban.

Abdallah b. 'Umar reported that the Prophet (saws) said, "Hearts are like vessels, some more attentive and capacious than others. When you supplicate Allah you should be certain of being answered, and know that Allah does not answer a supplication that comes from a careless and inattentive heart."

Narrated by Ahmad

Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 2248 Narrated by Abu Hurayrah

Allah's Messenger (saws) said, "There are three whose supplication is not rejected: one who has just ended a fast, a just imam, and one who has been wronged, whose supplication is raised by Allah above the clouds and for which the gates of Heaven are opened. The Lord says, 'I swear by My might that I shall certainly help you, though it be after some time.'"

Abu Hurairah reported that the Prophet (saws) said, "Your supplication will be answered if you are not impatient, and if you do not say, 'I supplicated but my supplication was not heard'."

Narrated by Malik.

In light of the above aayah and the various narrations from the Messenger of Allah (saws), it is evident that no supplication to Allah of a believer, is ever left unanswered.

Your Question: In my prayers, can i ask Allah to have a change in heart in her parents heart, so that they accept my proposal and we get married.

One may supplicate Allah for anything lawful one’s heart may desire or please, for Allah Subhanah listens and responds to each and every lawful supplication of His believing and repentant slaves.

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Baqarah verse 216:

216 It is possible that ye dislike a thing which is good for you, and that ye love a thing which is bad for you. But Allah Knows and ye know not.

Beloved although it is permissible to supplicate Allah for whatever lawful one’s heart may desire, a better supplication to make would be the one listed below as taught by the Messenger of Allah (saws) when performing the ‘Istakhara’ prayer and supplication, for it is very possible that we may love something but it may not be good for us, or that we may dislike something but that thing is good for us…Allah Subhanah Knows and we know not; thus one should always put their complete trust and belief in their Lord Most Merciful Alone.

‘O Allah! I seek Your guidance (in making a choice) by virtue of Your knowledge, and I seek ability by virtue of Your power, and I ask You of Your great bounty. You have power, I have none. And You know, I know not. You are the Knower of hidden things.O Allah! If in Your knowledge, (this matter) is good for my religion, my livelihood and my affairs; immediate and in the distant, then ordain for me, make it easy for me and bless it for me. And if in Your knowledge, (this matter) is bad for my religion, my livelihood and my affairs; immediate and in the distant, then turn it away from me, and turn me away from it. And ordain for me the good wherever it be and make me pleased with it.’

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

Burhan