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According to Islam what should be frequency of sex in a Month?

Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

 

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

I am having vry much dought @ sex and Islam

I want a whole book on this topic from where I can get it?

Again I wnat to ask you some question.

 

1) According to Islam what should be frequency of sex in a Month?

2) I am eger to have sex but wife is not responding then what can be done?

3) Can wife as well as can ask for talak on issue of sex?

 

Khuda Hafiz

waiting for your reply

 

(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)

 

Answer:

 

Sex liberties

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

 

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Baqarah verse 223:

223 Your wives are as a tilth unto you; so approach your tilth when or how ye will.

 

Islam has allowed the husband and the wife bonded in the sacred institution of marriage every possible liberty to enjoy conjugal relations with each other, except three:

  1. It is strictly prohibited to have sexual intercourse with one’s wife during her period of menstruation.
  2. It is strictly prohibited to enter the woman through her anus.
  3. Although there is no specific prohibition mentioned in the Quran and Sunnah, the majority of the scholars in Islam have voiced their opinion against ‘oral’ sex, whereby one touches the other’s private organs with their mouth.

 

Other than the above three restrictions, one may enjoy conjugal relations with one’s wife any place, any time, and any how their heart’s desire.

 

Your Question: According to Islam what should be frequency of sex in a Month?

Abu Dhar al-Ghafari reported: ‘The Messenger of Allah (saws) said: “there is a reward for you [even] in sex with your wife."’ The companions asked: ‘O Messenger of Allah (saws) is there a reward if one satisfies his passion?" He (saws) said: "Do you know that if he satisfies it unlawfully he has taken a sin upon himself? Likewise, if he satisfies it lawfully, he is rewarded."

Related by Ahmad and Muslim.

 

Just as every individual is blessed with a different natural appetite for the quantity of food one consumes, every individual is blessed with a different appetite for sex! There might be one whose appetite for sex is much greater than another and needs to fulfill his natural physical desire maybe ten times in a day, while another might be satisfied with a few times or even only once in a month.

 

Islam has not laid down or prescribed the minimum or maximum frequency that a couple bonded in the sacred institution of marriage must maintain….but rather left this choice upon the two concerned individuals themselves.

 

The guidance Islam does give is that when one partner in marriages desires and invites their spouse to fulfill their natural physical desire for sex, the other must immediately respond to their invitation favorably, regardless of what they might be occupied with at that time.

 

Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 3257 Narrated by Talq ibn Ali

Allah's Messenger (saws) said, "When a man calls his wife to satisfy his desire she must go to him even if she is occupied at the oven."

 

Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 4.460 Narrated by Abu Huraira

Allah's Messenger (saws) said, "If a husband calls his wife to his bed (i.e. to have sexual relation) and she refuses and causes him to sleep in anger, the Angels will curse her till morning."

 

Your Question: I am eger to have sex but wife is not responding then what can be done?

When one partner in marriage invites the other to satisfy their natural and lawful desire for sex, it is not right for the other to refuse their invitation. If one refuses the invitation of their partner without an absolutely valid reason, they would indeed be guilty of not fulfilling their due rights and responsibility in the marriage and would thus incur a great sin upon themselves.

 

If one feels that their partner is not eager to fulfill their due rights in their marriage, one should make their concern known to their partner in no uncertain terms. If the conditions still do not improve, one is well within their rights in Islam to divorce their wife or seek to marry another wife.

 

Your Question: Can wife as well as can ask for talak on issue of sex?

Because the fulfillment of one’s natural desire for sex can only be lawfully satisfied through the sacred institution of marriage in Islam, the husband and the wife both are well within their rights in Islam to initiate a divorce proceedings on the issue of sex.

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

 

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

 

 

Burhan


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