I have been married for abt 8 months and i was engaged in long distance now that we are married and together my husband is a completly different person then the one i knew while we were engage and i talked to over the telephone.
Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,
As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)
One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:
I have been married for abt 8 months and i was engaged in long distance now that we are married and together my husband is a completly different person then the one i knew while we were engage and i talked to over the telephone. and since we have been married after abt 3 months everything has changed he has doubts abuot me he thinks i lie to him about every lil thing(which is not true) he used to tell me he prays but he does not when i as him why he said i lied to you. he drinks behind my back. and he accusses me of lying. he does not beleive me and he does not allow me go to my parents home. what should i do? please advise me.
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In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.
Dear and beloved Sister, Islam has recognized that human beings are not animals which when bonded together must stay together; but if Allah forbid, one finds themselves unfortunately bonded in an incompatible or unhappy marriage, both the husband and the wife in Islam have a right to initiate a divorce and free themselves from their marriage union.
Beloved Sister, under the circumstances you have mentioned, you have two lawful options:
- If you have hope that the situation will change in the future, and if you sincerely believe that your husband can be guided to fear Allah, start worshipping Allah as He deserves to be worshipped, and stop transgressing the clear boundaries of Allah..it would be best that you strive to, with patience and wisdom, guide your husband to the path of righteousness and piety.and thus save your marriage.
- But if even after your very best efforts, you do not see any hope of your husband fearing Allah and honoring His Boundaries, it would be best that you free yourself from such an evil person through a divorce.
Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allahs Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.
Your brother and well wisher in Islam,