Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.  (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

Assalamoalikum,

my question is about "wali" for daughters. can you please suggest me, the QURANIC REFERENCES in which there is mention about the actuall "wali" of the daughters and

1. Is it possible for a girl according to ISLAMIC POINT OF VIEW to go for their own choice for marriage without the consent of their actuall "wali" ??

2.what is the criteria for selecting the exact life partner for a girl if she is well educated i.e if she has done Master and well religious ??

3. what if the uncle of a girl is keep pressurising his brother to give her daugther`s hand (who has done master and well religious ) in hand of his son , although he is not even done matric and is just a tractor driver for delivering construction material to different customers ??

please give advice according to the TEACHINGS OF ISLAM & QURANIC REFERENCE , ALSO IF SOME GREAT ISLAMIC BOOKS REFERENCE . because we are in deep trouble. please guide us in the right way...... MAY ALLAH GIVE YOU LOTS OF COURAGE AND REWARD FOR WHAT YOU ARE DOING FOR THE ISLAMIC COMMUNITY.

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Answer:

Wali in marriage from quran

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is none worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

Your Question: my question is about "wali" for daughters. can you please suggest me, the QURANIC REFERENCES in which there is mention about the actuall "wali" of the daughters

Dear and beloved brother in Islam, in a moral and righteous society that Islam strives to build, it is inconceivable and there is absolutely no concept that a believing woman, who sincerely fears Allah and the Last Day, would seek to marry someone herself without the prior consultation and consent of her parents/guardians (wali).

Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Baqarah verse 221:

221 Do not marry unbelieving women (idolaters) until they believe; a slave woman who believes is better than an unbelieving woman even though she allure you. Nor marry (your girls) to unbelievers until they believe: a man slave who believes is better than un unbeliever even though he allure you. Unbelievers do (but) beckon you to the fire. But Allah beckons by His grace to the Garden (of Bliss) and forgiveness and makes His Signs clear to mankind: that they may celebrate His praise.

Although there is no specific mention of the ‘wali’ for marriage in the Glorious Quran, their presence and consent is virtually implied.

For example in the above quoted verse of Surah Baqarah, when Allah prohibits the believing men from marrying idolatrous women, His Command to the men is: ‘Do not marry idolatrous women until they believe.’ But when the Lord Most High prohibits the believing women from marry idolatrous men, His Command is directed and addressed towards the parents/guardians (wali) of the girl: ‘Nor marry (your daughters) to disbelievers until they believe.’

Thus, in light of the absolutely guidance of the Holy Quran, the consent of the parents/guardians (wali) of the bride is clearly implied; but there are several specific commands and guidance in the established and authentic Sunnah of the Messenger of Allah (saws), whereby the consent of the ‘wali’ is specifically mentioned.

Your Question: Is it possible for a girl according to ISLAMIC POINT OF VIEW to go for their own choice for marriage without the consent of their actuall "wali" ??

The absolute majority of the scholars in Islam are of the opinion that under all circumstances the consent of the bride to her marriage is an absolutely obligatory condition of an Islamic marriage; but under some specific circumstances (like when the girl has accepted Islam but her parents or guardians are disbelievers, etc.), the ‘Judge’ or anyone else may be appointed the ‘wali’ of the girl, who would give her hand in marriage to the suitor.

Sunan of Abu-Dawood Hadith 2078 Narrated byAisha, Ummul Mu'minin

The Messenger of Allah (saws) said: ‘The marriage of a woman who marries without the consent of her guardians (wali) is void.’ (He (saws) said these words) three times.

Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 3137 Narrated by Abu Hurayrah

Allah's Messenger (saws) said, "A woman may not give another woman in marriage, nor may she give herself in marriage; for the immoral woman is the one who gives herself in marriage."

Under normal circumstances, especially when the parents of the girl are alive and are believers, it would not behove and befit a believing woman who sincerely fears Allah and the Last Day, to marry someone without the prior consent of her parents/guardians.

Your Question: what is the criteria for selecting the exact life partner for a girl if she is well educated i.e if she has done Master and well religious ??

Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 3090 Narrated by Abu Hurayrah

Allah's Messenger (saws) said, 'When someone with whose religion and character you are satisfied asks your daughter in marriage, accede to his request. If you do not do so, there will be temptation on earth and extensive corruption.'

Although one may choose or seek to marry another for any reason, the guidance of the Messenger of Allah (saws) for the girl and her guardians when seeking a groom in marriage for their daughter are:

1. They should be satisfied with the state and practice of the suitor’s belief and religion,
2. They should be satisfied with the suitor’s character.

Your Question: what if the uncle of a girl is keep pressurising his brother to give her daugther`s hand (who has done master and well religious ) in hand of his son , although he is not even done matric and is just a tractor driver for delivering construction material to different customers ??

Beloved brother in Islam, firstly, the guidance of Islam gives more weight to one’s state of belief, and deeds, and character than to one’s worldly educational qualifications or his source of livelihood!

Secondly, as much as Islam guides the believing woman who seeks to marry to consult and seek the consent of her guardians/parents; the absolutely final decision and right of whether to agree to marry a person or not is in the hands of the bride herself alone. Islam has given the believing woman the absolute right to decide whether she wills to marry a person or not; and that is precisely why her agreement and acceptance to her marriage at the time of ‘nikaah’ is an absolutely obligatory condition for a marriage to be legal in the Sight of Shariah.

Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 9.101 Narrated by Aisha

Allah's Messenger (sws) said, "It is essential to have the consent of a virgin (for her marriage).’ I (Aisha) said, "A virgin feels shy." The Prophet (saws) said, "Her silence means her consent."

Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 9.98 Narrated by Abu Huraira

The Prophet (saws) said, "A virgin should not be married till she is asked for her consent; and the matron (divorcee, widow, etc.) should not be married till she is asked whether she agrees to marry or not." It was asked, "O Allah's Messenger (saws)! How will she (the virgin) express her consent?" He (saws) said, "By keeping silent."

It is an absolutely obligatory condition of a marriage to be legal in the Sight of Shariah for the bride to consent to her marriage. If the bride is a virgin, and she feels shy to declare or respond her approval, her silence will be accepted as her approval; but if a matron (one who is divorced, or a widow, etc.) is married, her silence will not be accepted as her approval, but she must verbally declare her acceptance to the Judge conducting the marriage.

If for any reason the girl who is forced to marry a person against her will, or she does not wish to marry the said person….all she ever has to do is verbally decline and declare to the Judge conducting the marriage that she is unwilling to marry the said person; and that marriage will be immediately cancelled!

Islam guides that a marriage is not a simple union between just two people, but rather a union of two families….thus neither should the parents/guardians force their daughters into a marriage she does not consent to; nor should the girl seek to marry someone without prior consultation and consent of her sincere best well-wishers in all of mankind, ie. her parents/guardians.

If one trusts, obeys, and follows the guidance and commands of Allah and His Messenger (saws), one can be assured of never ever being misled; but if one believes, obeys and follows any other guidance, other than that of Allah and His Messenger (saws), one can be assured of being led astray.

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me alone. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your brother and well wisher in Islam,

Burhan