Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,

As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh.  (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)

One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:

To whom it may concern,

assalamu alaykum

i am 24 years old and am currently recieving proposals of marriage which my parents would like me to consider. This makes me feel extremely uncomfortable as im not sure if i can ever love again. i was in love with someone i met at university for four years my mother disapproved as he was shia and im sunni. he is married now, and i realise i should get on with my life but im still finding it difficult.

my question is is it permissible for a girl not to marry. as im not sure i could make anyone happy

thankyou

look forward to your reply

(There may be some grammatical and spelling errors in the above statement. The forum does not change anything from questions, comments and statements received from our readers for circulation in confidentiality.)

Answer:

Is it sin not to marry?

In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is no one (no idol, no person, no grave, no prophet, no imam, no dai, nobody!) worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad(saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.

To get married is not an obligatory act, but rather considered an extremely preferred Sunnah in Islam; and if one does not wish to get married for any reason, there is no sin upon him/her.

Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 3096 Narrated by Anas ibn Malik

Allah's Messenger (saws) said, "When a man marries he has fulfilled half of the religion; so let him fear Allah regarding the remaining half."

Beloved sister in Islam, although you have not specifically asked us to comment on your situation of getting married, as your well-wishers and brothers in Islam it is our duty to inform you that the condition that your heart feels at this moment might not be permanent that it would not be possible for you to love someone else. Time is a great healer indeed, and with time the conditions will change and so will the thought that you have today: that it would not be possible for you to love someone else or make him happy.

Instead of making up your mind never to marry because of one past experience, it would be better and more righteous to keep your options open and give the wound some time to heal, and seek to look forward to the rest of your life. Keep your full Trust in Allah Subhanah and know for sure that He is well aware of the exact condition of each of His believing slaves. Remain constant in His remembrance and obedience, and in all humility and hope beseech him to provide for you what is best for your deen, for your life in this world, and for your life in the Hereafter.

Al-Tirmidhi Hadith 3090 Narrated by Abu Hurayrah

Allah's Messenger (saws) said, 'When someone with whose religion and character you are satisfied asks for your daughter in marriage, accede to his request. If you do not do so, there will be temptation on Earth, and extensive corruption.'

Sahih Al-Bukhari Hadith 7.27 Narrated by Abu Huraira

The Prophet (saws) said, "A woman is married for four things, i.e., her wealth, her family status, her beauty and her religion. So you should marry the religious woman (otherwise) you will be a loser."

If one trusts, obeys, and follows the guidance and commands of Allah and His Messenger (saws), he can be assured of never ever being misled; but if one believes, obeys and follows any other guidance, other than that of Allah and His Messenger (saws), he can be assured of being led astray.

Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allah’s Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.

Your Brother in Islam,

Burhan