Relationship if kin marries hindu
Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,
As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)
One of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:
Dear Burhan - Assalam alai kum
May Allah Bless you for the efforts that you put in spreading the Word Of Allah.
We (my family) are in a dilemma. My sister-in-law`s daugther was recently married to a Hindu in India. We tried our best to dissuade her and her parents but she had her father`s (a very modern secular muslim) support and her mother went along with the wedding with pomp which included a `nikah` (where the boy was converted to a muslim on the spot saying "La Ilaha Illallah") and "pheras" according to hindu rites. My family boycotted the marriage absolutely - no attendance. We have tried to talk to my in-laws family but they are too modernized and secularized living in
The question is quite long but I am sure that I will get the right answer in the light of the Quran, Sunnah and Hadith from you.
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In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and whoever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is no one (no idol, no person, no grave, no prophet, no imam, no dai, nobody!) worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad(saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.
It is absolutely illegal and prohibited for a believing woman to marry a non-believing man in Islam.
Allah Says in the Holy Quran Chapter 2 Surah Baqarah verse 221 (part): Nor marry (your girls) to unbelievers until they believe: a man slave who believes is better than un unbeliever even though he allure you. Unbelievers do (but) beckon you to the fire. But Allah beckons by His grace to the Garden (of Bliss) and forgiveness and makes His Signs clear to mankind: that they may celebrate His praise.
But if the man openly and verbally declares the testimony of faith or shahaadah, regardless of what are his intentions in his heart, then he will be legally considered a muslim, and all the rights that are due to a muslim will be accorded to him in full; he can marry a believing woman, he will be given a muslim burial upon his death, he can visit the Holy Places, etc. It is not for the believers to decide whether he is a real muslim or not, or judge whether he took the shahaadah for an ulterior motive, etc.; because no person has been given a right to judge the others intentions or read what exactly is in the heart of the other. That Power and Decision belongs to Allah Subhanah Alone, and He Alone will Judge who was indeed a true and real believer on the Day of Resurrection.
But if the believing woman or her family have prior and exact knowledge that the pagan man has absolutely no intention of becoming a believer, or have conspired with the pagan man to declare the shahaadah and thus dupe the believers into accepting the pagan as a believer so that they could marry their daughter to him, etc. then they will be guilty of making a mockery of the command of Allah Subhanah. Unless they seek sincere repentance from the Merciful Lord before they meet with their appointment of death, they will have an extremely severe accounting in the Just Court of the All-Just Lord on an Inevitable Day.
Q-1) What should be our relationship to my sister-in-law (especially my wife)
Beloved and dear Brother in Islam, if the pagan man has openly declared the shahaadah, he will be considered a legal muslim, and his marriage to the believing woman will be considered valid in the sight of Shariah.
Q-2) We have cut our relationship with her daughter totally - is that right?
It would only be wise and righteousness to maintain your and your wifes relationship with the sister-in-law, because that is the only way you can invite her to fear her Lord and Creator and seek His forgiveness. It is not legal for the believers to break the blood-relations which Allah Subhanah has created for us, regardless of what they do.
Q-3) My other in-laws have supported this wedding by taking part in it totally - what should be our stand with them?
As much as you and your wife detest and abhor what they might have done when they all conspired to make a mockery of the commands of Allah Subhanah, it would only be righteousness in the sight of the Lord if you maintained cordial and good relations which them for the sake of Allah Subhanah. Your this detestation and abhorrence at their gross negligence disobedience of the Commands of the Merciful Lord is a sign of your faith and emaan, and a sign of your love and reverence of the Commands of the Lord All-Mighty.
It would be wise to maintain a good and cordial relationship with your relatives, so that with extreme patience and wisdom you may invite them to fear the Wrath and Anger of the All-Mighty Lord, and seek sincere repentance from Him before they meet with their appointment of death. If in your valid anger and abhorrence of their making a mockery of the Commands of Allah, you distance yourselves from them; they might loose the only people who really care about their well-being in the eternal life of the Hereafter. Thus as much as you hate what they have done, you should be patient, and strike a cordial relationship with them, so that someday you might be able to invite them to the Truth and thus save them from the everlasting punishment of the All-Mighty Lord.
Q-4) We have an occasion in our family (a wedding) - should we invite my sister-in-law and her daughter (which would include her husbsand) for this wedding?
There is absolutely no harm if you invite them, provided your intention is not to condone what they have done; but for the sake of bringing them closer to seeking the forgiveness of their Merciful Lord and Creator.
Your relationship with them should be like a relationship between the doctor and the patient! The doctor never hates the patient, but rather he hates and treats the disease of the patient.
We do not even ask about her well-being to my sister-in-law which upsets her a
lot - would that be alright to inquire about her?
Again, provided your intentions are to bring them closer to the forgiveness of their Lord, there is absolutely no harm in maintaining good and cordial relations with them.
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 66 Surah Tahreem verse 6: O you who have believed, save yourselves and your families from a Fire whose fuel shall be men and stones; over which shall be appointed fierce and stern angels, who never disobey Allahs Command, and they only do as they are commanded!
Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allahs Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.
Your Brother in Islam,