What to pray on the grave of the parents?
Mu' meneen Brothers and Sisters,
As Salaam Aleikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatuh. (May Allah's Peace, Mercy and Blessings be upon all of you)
one of our brothers/sisters has asked this question:
Assalam U Alaikum,
Sir please advise me the best deed that I can do for my Marhoom Abba Ammi (they are no more in this world) as per Quran Shareef & Huzur Hadis (saws). Or when I visit their Grave what best shud I recite their I mean the best Surah as Normally when ever I visit Graveyard (My Abba Ammi Grave) I normally put water on their Grave , recite Surah Yaseen surah Tabarak Surah Fatiah & then I pray to Almighty Allah to please accept my Small efforts & what ever comes best of this to benefit Huzur (saws) all Ambiya All Aulia All our Pious Elders & then Particularly to my Abba Ammi All my Relatives & All Muslims (Marhoom) Sir please correct me if I m wrong So Inshallah when ever next time I will go to Graveyard I will perform perfectly as per Quran & Hadis Inshallah.
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In the name of Allah, We praise Him, seek His help and ask for His forgiveness. Whoever Allah guides none can misguide, and who-ever He allows to fall astray, none can guide them aright. We bear witness that there is no one (no idol, no person, no grave, no prophet, no imam, no dai, nobody!) worthy of worship but Allah Alone, and we bear witness that Muhammad (saws) is His slave-servant and the seal of His Messengers.
Your wish and intention to do something for your deceased parents is indeed a noble intention. One should always strive to serve and obey his/her parents when they are alive, and when they die, the child must do deeds that will benefit them in the next world. The rights, love, respect, and obedience that Allah has commanded the believers towards their parents, is second only to the rights of Allah and His Messenger (saws).
The best and most beneficial deed that a child can do for his deceased parents, is that he/she makes dua and supplications to Allah for them. And these duas and supplications may be done at all times, not only when visiting the graves.
The best duas are the ones that are mentioned for the parents in the Holy Quran.
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 14 Surah Ibrahim verse 41:O our Lord! Forgive me and my parents, and all the believers, on the Day when Reckoning shall be held.
Allah says in the Holy Quran Chapter 17 Surah Israa verse 23-24:Your Lord has enjoined on you the following: You should not worship anyone but Him. (You should) treat your parents with great consideration; and if either or both of them live with you in their old age, do not even say uff to them; nor rebuke them, but speak kind words to them; treat them with humility and tenderness, and pray: O our Lord, be merciful to them, just as they brought me up with kindness and affection.
You can always make supplication to Allah in your own words and in your own language, for Allah is indeed All Knowing, All Hearing, All Merciful. Beg and supplicate Allah in all humility to have mercy on them, forgive them, raise their position in Paradise, etc.
The other thing we should do is sadaqa jaariyah or charity in their name. Build mosques, build Islamic Institutions, help publish Quran and Islamic books, build hospitals, build Islamic schools, build orphanages or widow homes, etc. in their names and beg Allah to accept these deeds. For all the above good deeds you do in your parents name, the Merciful Lord will Insha Allah give them the reward without reducing any of the reward that is due to you. The better muslim you are, the better the reward that will be given to your parents, for it was their teachings and their patience and their sacrifices that made you a believer you are today.
The other good deed you can do for them, is that you must respect and honor the relatives, friends, and loved ones of your deceased parents. You must be good and kind to them, and help them in whatever way you can and to the best of your ability.
Allah will Insha Allah, make all these good deeds a source of ajr and reward for you, as well as for your parents.
Ref: When visiting the Grave
The first thing we must do when we visit any graveyard is invoke the prayer that the Messenger of Allah (saws) used to invoke whenever he visited a graveyard.
THE DUA IS: 'AS SALAAM ALEIKUM AHLED-DIYAAR MINAL MUSLIMEENA WAL MUMINEEN, WA INNA INSHA ALLAH BEKUM LAHIQOON. YAGFIRALLAHU LANA WA LAKUM.
EXACT TRANSLATION WOULD BE: "PEACE BE UPON YOU, O PEOPLE OF THIS PLACE (GRAVEYARD) FROM THE MUSLIMEEN AND MUMINEEN. WE, TOO, GOD WILLING, ARE COMING BEHIND YOU. MAY ALLAH FORGIVE US AND YOU ALL."
Peace be upon you, O people of this place (graveyard). We too are coming behind you. May Allah forgive us and you all.
Then make dua and supplication as related in the aayahs quoted above, or make dua in your own language to Allah to forgive them, have mercy on them, and raise their status in Paradise, etc.
It is not proven from the deeds of the Prophet (saws), that he would water the graves, or pray any particular Surah from the Holy Quran on the graves; thus we should avoid doing anything that the Messenger of Allah (saws) did not do. To pray any particular Surah everytime one visits the grave is not from the Sunnah of the Prophet (saws); and thus it is an innovation. And as it with all innovations, it must be avoided. He (saws) used to visit the graveyard and supplicate Allah, and make extensive duas in their favor; and we should always follow the Prophet (saws) in whatever we do.
Whatever written of Truth and benefit is only due to Allahs Assistance and Guidance, and whatever of error is of me. Allah Alone Knows Best and He is the Only Source of Strength.
Your brother and well wisher in Islam,